Every girl needs to know the signs that a guy is not worthy of her attention. Dating a guy like that will make you unhappy because they will suck the life out of you in one way or another. If you have already started dating a guy unworthy of your attention, rather leave him. Believe me, you deserve the best. A girl looking for true love shouldn't put up with this behavior.
He demands all your attention
If a guy is too clingy, this is the first sign that he is not worthy of you. Such a guy is easy to recognize, because he does not leave you for a minute, 24 hours a day. In those rare moments when he is still not with you, he interrupts your phone with calls and bombards you with messages. This type of guy is emotionally needy, he will only be happy when you are around, and pout when you are apart. Avoid these guys, because they will demand that you give them all your free time and you will not have a minute for yourself.
He often disappears
If your boyfriend often disappears and does not make himself felt for days or weeks, then it's time to say goodbye. These days it takes less than a minute to call or text, so stop putting up with this behavior if it happens on a regular basis. A guy who is in a serious relationship does not have to track down, because he is always in touch with you.
He emotionally abuses you.
Another sign of this guy is emotional abuse. Emotional abuse takes many forms, such as criticism, humiliation, insults, belittling. If your boyfriend makes you feel bad, leave him. Such a guy will destroy your self-esteem and undermine your self-confidence.
He is interrogating
It's okay if your friend is often interested in your life, but if it looks like an interrogation, consider whether it is worth being with him. The investigator guy is not sure of himself, and he will investigate in detail every hour of your life, looking for signs of suspicious behavior. Even when you were completely honest and sincere with him, he will accuse you of deception. This type of guy believes that all girls are cheating, and nothing you say will change his opinion.
He makes little effort for relationships.
A relationship with a guy who makes little effort for your union can lead to your emotional drain from the fact that only you are doing everything to keep the relationship afloat. Relationships require two people to work, only then people will be happy and contented. It's unfair for a guy to shift the responsibility onto your shoulders. If he doesn't want to work on a relationship, then you shouldn't even think about such a guy.
He has a relationship, but not with you
If you go on dates with a guy who every time comes up with new excuses why he cannot be with you, then he is clearly not worthy of you. Usually these guys already have someone, and they are in a long-term relationship. You may hear from him that he cannot leave the family because of the children, or that the divorce is not over yet. The worst thing that he can tell you is that he is still in love with Her and cannot choose between the two of you. If he is ready to end his long-term relationship, he will end up and be with you!
He is emotionally unavailable
This is the guy who keeps his emotions under lock and key from his partner. Such a guy is not worthy of your attention, because he will never be able to give you the relationship that you are looking for. He will shy away from any serious commitments, and find a bunch of reasons for this. Perhaps he is afraid to devote himself to one girl for life, or he is still healing his broken heart, or he simply does not want a serious relationship.
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Young people today are very different from their peers 40-50 years ago. They like to wear clothes that can hardly be called masculine. They love to be constantly praised, patted on the head, and wiped away their tears, like a little one. At the same time, they have nothing unreasonable confidence in their irresistibility for girls and women. It seems to them that all the women around them, at the sight of them, should immediately fall at their feet and pray for love. At the same time, there is another type of men who have opposite skills and external data. These guys, after watching TV advertisements and Hollywood films, in which there are a huge number of gay subjects, understand that they are not suitable for their chosen one. As a result, they leave their passion, leaving that in upset feelings, with a complete lack of understanding of what is happening. For some ladies, this article will be useful, because in it we will talk about what to do if a man thinks he is not worthy of you?.
However, before continuing, I would like to show you a couple more interesting news on the topic of relationships and romantic feelings. For example, what to do If a man does not believe in love; Do we love if there is nothing in common between us; If a guy does not fight for his love, then he does not love; find out if you are loved or used, etc.
So, let's continue, what if my boyfriend thinks he is not worthy of me?
The reasons for this belief
The first reason... Unsuccessful experience. To begin with, you should " dig around"in his past, and try to find out why your chosen one had such thoughts. Most likely, he had a rather sad previous experience with a girl, or even your own behavior (the snow queen). And if your partner is really gentle , kind and honest, then most likely, he sees his flaws in behavior, and believes that he has a bad character.Most men of this type are more secretive and withdrawn individuals than romantic and loving people.A similar subspecies of a male representative shows his feelings in practice, and very rarely in words. It is impossible to get a declaration of love from him, but his devotee will say everything and " luminous"look. For girls, this is understandably not enough, because they love more with their ears than with their mind. Therefore, difficult days come for a guy, because at every meeting, his passion tries to ensure that he finally tells her about his feelings. And if this is not happens, there are endless scandals and nagging.
With such behavior, you want to awaken tenderness in him, but in the end, after such a strong pressure, he begins to feel uncomfortable, realizing that he is hurting and disappointing his girlfriend. It occurs to him " excellent"the idea, to break off a relationship, so as not to torment a loved one.
The second reason... Money. 
An equally important role in the relationship between a man and a girl is the financial issue. When your chosen one finds out that you have rich parents, or you yourself earn excellent money, he gradually begins to develop an inferiority complex. Watching how you make purchases over and over again for astronomical amounts for him, he realizes that in the near future he is certainly not able to afford such expenses. And since a man is a breadwinner, then he gradually has a complex due to his financial "weakness". Gradually, these thoughts begin to oppress him, and in order not to spoil his nerves, he just takes it and leaves. Probably, he does not want to spoil life, not to yourself, realizing that you have nothing in common with him.
But there were also other men who behave in an absolutely opposite way, but for some reason think that they are not good enough for their lovely ladies. And therefore, such men simply leave, leaving the women who love them in complete confusion. What to do if your boyfriend thinks that he is not worthy of you, and you are completely sure of the opposite?
Causes
First, it is necessary to understand why the young person had such thoughts. This is most likely due to bad previous experience or your own behavior. For example, if your young man is really kind, honest, noble, loyal and loves you very much, then this behavior may be caused by the fact that he sees shortcomings in himself and considers them too serious. Many men of this type are not romantic enough and withdrawn in feelings. They say “I love you” almost once in their life, and they express all their love by actions, not words. For girls who, as we all know, love with their ears, this is not enough, and they begin to systematically arrange scandals and tantrums about the fact that the guy will never say a word, and does not love her at all. Thus, you just want to get tenderness from him, and the young man accumulates a feeling that he constantly disappoints and hurts you, so in the end the man simply decides not to torment his beloved one and leaves.
Another reason a guy might decide he's not worthy of you is financially. If a man sees that you have rich parents or you yourself earn a lot, and for some reason he cannot give you so much money, the young man simply develops a complex. Looking how you buy expensive clothes, he begins to think that he has never will be able to afford such purchases and in such quantities. Thus, a man, like a breadwinner, begins to develop a complex and he decides that he is not financially reliable enough for you. As a result, the man, disappointed in himself, leaves. In fact, he does not want to ruin your life, believing that someone else will be able to give you everything that they are used to, and he will make you endure those living conditions that are unacceptable for you.
These two reasons are the main reasons for a man to consider himself unworthy. As a rule, really good guys come to this idea, who really do not notice all their positive qualities. And if they drive something into their heads, then it becomes extremely difficult to dissuade them, but it is still possible.
So, we ourselves often become the reason for making such decisions. Let's look at one situation from the perspective of a man and a woman, for example, a girl has a birthday. The guy brings her an armful of roses and hands her, but since for some reason he himself is not in the mood, his congratulations sound rather dry. The girl, seeing this, throws a tantrum about the fact that he does not love her, that he cannot say anything good, word for word, everything passes on to the person and can even go so far that the girl starts shouting something totype “I hate you, you you always hurt me. " What do we get in the end? For a woman, it was just a surge of emotions. She does not hate anyone and values her man very much, just in this way she wanted to make it clear that she needed more romance, without which she felt bad. And what does a man see? He sees that no matter how he tries to show his love, instead he just hurts her. That his own feelings and emotions ruin her life. And if such situations are methodically repeated, then in the end, the guy simply concludes that he really only brings pain and disappointment. And leaves.
How to resolve the problem?
And after that we suddenly realize that we do not need niromancy, nor "I love you" every half hour, but just want him to be there. To get started, you just need to talk to him. Just remember that you no longer need to make any claims to him. The point is now that he can do whatever he wants, and you will close your eyes. It says that you will no longer demand from him those manifestations of feelings that are unnatural for him. Therefore, calling a man into a conversation, immediately let him understand the fact that you really love him and you feel good with him. Even with such a taciturn and withdrawn, you are fine. And maybe you want not quite the kind of romance he offers you, but this does not mean that you cannot live without it. In fact, your behavior is a woman's whims. And yes, you pursued the goal of changing something, because, as you know, women are great idealists and perfectionists, but now you understand that you can live without passionate declarations of love and a carpet of roses on the floor. But you can't live without your man.
If your boyfriend starts to speak some arguments and prove that you really will be better off without him - just kiss. Trust me, the kiss will make him forget what he was saying and will significantly reduce his desire to be noble and let you go. And then tell him that you love him, that you want to be only with him and you don’t give a damn about the fact that he will talk about love once a year, on your birthday, and that is not the fact that it will be. You must make the man believe you, so that he has no doubts that he is not bad, but that you are sometimes too capricious.
And the last thing that also needs to be remembered is the money issue. In this case, it is more difficult to persuade a man, because he loses confidence in himself, as in a breadwinner. Therefore, you need to show him that, firstly, it does not matter to you at all whether you bought a blouse from a second-hand or vboutika, and, secondly, to convince a man that money will never bring you happiness and he misunderstood you. Perhaps this situation arose because you believed that your boyfriend could achieve more in his career. And for some reason he did not. Talk to him and tell him that it is not important to you how much he earns, but it is important how he unleashes his potential, because he has a really huge one. But if he nevertheless does not want to do this for some reasoned reasons, you will not touch him anymore, and if he is just lazy, then perhaps you will, but this will never happen because you do not have enough material resources. You just have enough, you just love him so much that you want the best for him.
Most likely, after such a conversation, the man will return and all you have to do is not to put pressure on his pain points anymore and try to really accept him as he is.
Question to the psychologist:
The fact is that he is a business man, his own business, a certain political career, and I am just a student. At the beginning of our relationship, he told me about his numerous former spectacular women, about random intimate relationships, about the so-called "sponsorship" (helping young girls - financial, for intimacy only with him, but in the absence of other relationships of this kind). He did not have so many serious relationships, only 3. He has a child from some relationships, but there was no legal marriage. (They do not communicate, the child calls another person the father, my man only pays alimony). He talked about the numerous and expensive gifts to his women, about traveling with them.
Two months ago he proposed to me to become his wife. I agreed. Because I love him madly. But I don't feel completely comfortable around him because of my insecurity. I can’t go to visit his friends with him, because I think they will be compared to my ex, that I’m not dressed that way, that there’s something wrong with me. I go to stores and buy myself expensive things that I can't afford to match it. Speaking of his gifts, I don’t know why, but from the very beginning of our relationship I didn’t receive a single gift, and I don’t ask, because I was not brought up that way. Once he offered me financial assistance, I was offended because I consider it humiliating. Terribly jealous of his former women. Not infrequently in my words addressed to him the words slip through: "She was better ...", "She was much more economical ...".
Tell us about yourself. On appearance: I do not consider myself a beauty, but I have a nice appearance. The figure is good, I go to the gym all the time. Never had a problem with male attention. I study at two universities. In Russia (for an engineer) and abroad (for an economist). I study on a budget, an excellent student. At the same time, I work in a company as a design engineer; I have my own machine, which I myself have earned. I know several languages (English, French, German, Turkish, Arabic). My parents earn good money, so I can't say that the difference is in some social class. This is my first relationship. Before that, in my life there was only study, work and household chores. I am a loner, I like to be alone. Sit at home in your free time, read a book, or go alone and look at the sea. Help me please. I do not want to lose this person whom I love very much.
The question is answered by the psychologist Benarescu Alexander Yakovlevich.
Hello Anna!
As I read your letter, it was not entirely clear to me what exactly you want?
Feeling worthy of your man?
Stop feeling insecure and become more confident?
Get rid of the fear of losing your man?
No matter how similar in meaning these questions are, they carry a layer of quite different feelings and attitudes, and the answers may be just as different. I will try to briefly answer each of these questions and perhaps some will be useful to you. Otherwise, I suggest making an appointment for a consultation, or contacting another specialist.
How to feel worthy of your man?
This question is inherently manipulative. If you decipher it, it will sound something like this: I want to make the man I have chosen choose me. Although he already chose you. However, the feeling of "unworthiness" also suggests that as the relationship develops, you compare yourself with his ex, you want to be the one or the one with whom he is no longer in a relationship. Which he refused and chose you. Why would you choose such a strategy is not entirely clear to me. In this matter, I recommend switching your attention from those with whom he stopped being, to yourself, who you would like to be. Real. No comparisons. In your life you are the mistress of your images, as well as of your actions and thoughts.
Stop feeling insecure and become more confident?
Uncertainty is a great quality that says that you feel a lack of something and want great results from yourself. And sometimes it's even great to feel this lack. If you did not feel it, you would never have developed to the level to which you have grown now. After all, you have a machine and you know a lot of languages and have a bunch of different achievements. However, if you translate this into negative, it can lead to a decrease in self-esteem, and can even lead to psychosomatic disorders. It is easy to become more confident. You just need to start treating yourself as normal. At this period of your life, at this stage of your development, this year, at this very moment, you are normal! This is a pretty powerful technique. It allows you to experience the perfect here and now. We are always changing, it is so laid down by nature. And tomorrow you will be different. The structure of your brain and body will change by a tiny fraction, and it will be just as normal. And this does not mean that yesterday you were less ideal or normal. You were just different. And it also depends on you what decisions you will make in relation to yourself and your changes.
Get rid of the fear of losing your man?
Who told you that it is not normal to lose loved ones? Perhaps you are now outraged by this question, but try to realize that there are no ways (except manipulation) that give 100% the result that your man will stay with you. Or are you with him. And love has nothing to do with it. Love and fear are opposite feelings to each other. Even manipulating, there is no 100% guarantee. In this case, I would recommend thinking about the following: we attract what we fear. Therefore, your existing fear will certainly not be attractive. And the more you "grow" it in yourself, the more likely it is that your relationship will fall apart. In this case, I recommend that you be open to him and honestly talk about your feelings and thoughts. After all, if he accepts you, he will accept you with your fears and doubts. And it will be the best medicine for you. Long-term relationships are built on trust. And if you want them, think about how much you can and want to trust yourself and him.
He demands all your attention
He often disappears
He is interrogating
He is emotionally unavailable
Hello. I ask you to help me understand the situation. I can't understand anything yet, or I just refuse to understand.
I am 23, Sasha is 26. He is in his 2nd year of internship as a surgeon. We live in different cities, but every week he came to me, or I came to his parents.
The relationship developed quickly - I met his relatives and they managed to fall in love with me. Everything we had with him was just wonderful - I did not feel such care, tenderness and warmth with anyone else. And he carried me in his arms, kissed my hands and feet, worried and worried. He fed from his own hands, and hugged me strongly. He could stare into my eyes for a long time and intently, without looking away. I tried to give me pleasure in everything, and I was really happy with everything, I thought, at last I found HIM, my own, my own.
At the beginning of the relationship, he said that he really wanted to create his own family, that he really wanted to have his own children. In this we coincided, since this is the main goal and meaning of my life. But he also said that until he finished his studies, he would not be able to start a family, since it had to be provided for somehow. At this point in time, he is not able to do this, since he has to pay off the salary that he receives for training, and he also does not have his own housing.
By the way, not long before I appeared in his life, he had been dating a girl for 7 years and they parted, as I understood, because she could no longer wait for him to finally mature. He suffered a lot, and in a sense I became his joy.
After meeting with him for about a month, I invited him to my brother's wedding, as my parents wanted to get to know him. He accepted the invitation and after that everything changed somehow. He began to be jealous of my past, for no reason, to suspect of something. It even happened that when we went for a walk together, he said that I would probably be ashamed to go with him, since I am so beautiful, not like him.
A couple of weeks after the invitation, he came to me and said that he could not go to the wedding with me, as it would not be right in relation to my family. He said that he could not give me what I want and that even my little finger is not worth it. He said that he could not love me during this time, which means he would never love me; that the problem is not in me, but in him, but what exactly is the problem in him - he did not say. He also said that he played with my feelings and was very sorry about it. He asked for forgiveness, looking into my eyes, and I saw how those eyes shine.
He also told me that he had read my poem, or rather what looked more like prose. The fact is that not long before I met him, I loved one person, and wrote him an "unsent farewell letter." It said that I will love him forever, because I can’t love anyone because he is my soul mate, etc. I was shocked, as Sasha rummaged through my things, and read something personal that was not intended for him. By the way, probably after that, I don't remember exactly, he asked me to read my poems to him.
Help me figure it out! I cannot understand why it was necessary to take me to your home, to let me into your family, to come to me?
At parting, he again looked intently into my eyes, which were glistening with tears, squeezed my hand tightly and left ...
What should I do? I want it back! Help!
Julia, why don't you want to accept his decision?
If you do not want to be with a person, how can you be forced.
You are shocked, you have claims that he rummaged in your things, he told you directly that he used, that he played with your feelings.
Think, maybe you were both wrong?
He really cannot offer you a family (you know the reasons) and he dissolves the relationship. And write that the family is now your main goal. It turns out that by meeting this person, you are going against your goals. At the moment, his goal is a career. And it is not known whether it will develop there or not (there is no home, normal earnings are not expected in the near future) Why do you need this person?
You met when both you and he had a period of rehabilitation after a past relationship, then he looked at things more soberly. I realized that he doesn't love you so much, that he cannot offer what you need (usually men say this when they really don't value a woman much)
And with your parents you were both in a hurry. And you have not yet considered the person when you began to invite him to the family and he hurried, succumbing to his first love. Then he made a decision (that the emu does not need this), which he told you about.
Perhaps he has some kind warm feelings for you, but he is not ready for marriage. He does not want to continue the relationship. Think, why would you "break into a closed door"? release the person. look for a more suitable one.
A man who has already taken place in his career. For men, it is always in the first place to put oneself in work, to acquire social status.
Why do you want to return it? To be close to a person who does not love you, who will not let you be realized. how mother and wife?
You are asking for help in what is contrary to your goal (family and children). Somewhere you are very good at deceiving yourself. With the goal of returning this man, your inner intention may be: to suffer, to get vivid feelings, to be a victim, to devote your life to this man without asking for anything in return, to satisfy the injured pride, but not how not to start a family and be loved.
And it turns out a man is an asshole, rummaging through my things, he has no money, no apartment, he said that he doesn’t love me, help me return him ..... Do you think your appeal is absurd ???
Julia, there are two goals. 1. Return this man. You can spend a certain amount of time and possibly marry him to yourself (80% probability, accompanied by a good psychologist)
2. It can be admitted that you were mistaken, that you placed too high hopes that this person will not give you what you want and find a person who is already ready to help you realize your need for a family, he should have the same need)
Julia It is advisable for you to contact me directly and decide on the goals. At the moment, you have a bad idea of how your family should look and, accordingly, have a poor idea of what kind of person can give it to you.
It is impossible to help a person if the stated goal contradicts the request. "I want to create a family and children, but with a person who is not ready for this and does not want to give it to me" DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME.
You try to transfer the brightness of feelings and emotions into poetry and sadness and suffering and feelings and love. And approach the choice of a companion more rationally, with the understanding that you will live for more than one year and he will become the father of your children. and they need to be raised and educated
Please contact Irina
Good answer 4 Bad answer 0Romantic relationships do not always develop like clockwork. It often happens that beloved ones cause a lot of problems. Here's how to interpret the phrase thrown by your beloved man: "I am not worthy of you"?
Many girls, having heard such a phrase from their boyfriend in response to a question about the future of their relationship, proudly lift their chins, considering themselves to be real queens. But, as one of the heroines of the TV series "Sex and the City" said, in this situation you should not consider yourself a queen, because you have just been kicked out ... Why are always straightforward men suddenly resorting to circumlocutions, excuses and in every possible way to hide the true essence of things? Why don't they just say, “I’m not happy with this relationship”?
The fact is that the "inhabitants of Mars" are sometimes very afraid of hurting the feelings of girls, therefore, in order to mask the sad essence of this phrase as much as possible, they resort to an evasive lie: "I am not worthy of you." Does it sound much better and more streamlined than the bitter truth? Another man subconsciously wants to present himself better than he is. And you can do this by belittling yourself in the eyes of the girl. In this case, the phrase about unworthiness is just perfect. Also, when a man says: I am not worthy of you, it speaks of his unwillingness to change himself for the better. It would seem that if you are unworthy, then reach the required level that your girlfriend too! Prove that your love means something. But no, men with such a character prefer the "reptilian" practice: to hide their heads in the sand and wait for what will happen.
But more often than not, this is not so rosy. Perhaps the man was initially not satisfied with such a relationship, and when he is put in a difficult situation for him (for example, the question of buying an apartment together or, more seriously, getting married), he begins to resort to convenient "excuses." Also, the relationship could initially be more relaxed and non-binding, and as they developed, when they became more serious, the girl's outlook on the future of their relationship changed to the exact opposite and she decided to talk about an engagement or even a wedding. It is difficult to say who may be to blame in such a situation - each couple has their own story, so it is better to solve it individually and with a certified psychologist.
But it can be assumed that the girl, unaware of the psychological storm in the soul of the young man, showed excessive assertiveness. In turn, the guy, instead of giving a clear answer or asking his girlfriend to talk about this serious topic at a more favorable time in a more favorable environment, begins to lie very awkwardly and stereotypically. What to do with a lover after such revelations is up to his girlfriend. Having decided once on such a lie that you will have to wait from him further? And won't it happen that one fine moment, finally convinced of his "unworthiness", he quietly leaves without saying goodbye? So isn't this a sign for a girl that she needs to take the first step towards breaking up?
Guys, despite their straightforwardness and rare use of the Aesopian language, nevertheless, sometimes come up with such excuses worthy of Byron's Don Juan. - creativity, as they say, is off the charts. So girls need to be very careful, and while reading this article, remember how guys can fool our heads. A very common variation on the "I'm not worthy of you" theme is confession ... of alcoholism and subsequent coding. It works like this: a man who is pleasant in all respects invites the girl he likes on a date with the vector to continue the evening in bed. Most often, this trick works the first time. Then there may be several more dates with a romantic ending, but suddenly the connection with the handsome man is cut off: he does not pick up the phone, does not call himself, does not appear on the network. And if the girl manages to ask him a tricky question "on the forehead", then he, not at a loss, will say: "I went into a binge. A year ago I was coded, I didn’t take a drop of alcohol into my mouth, then I was tempted - and off we go ... ”. As a rule, stupid girls, deciding that dating a drunkard is not comme il faut, give up the idea of continuing a relationship with such a person. The girls understand smarter - they have just been "prodinam", speaking in the jargon of pick-up artists.
Another excuse: "I suggest you stay friends." Of course, after such a phrase, one should not even count on friendly relations - the “friend” stops answering calls, does not respond to messages on social networks. And the most "funny" version of the excuse was suggested by the ex-boyfriend of one of the regular visitors to the forum "Woman. Ru ": he summed up his unwillingness to tie the knot, not only because he is" unworthy ", but also because ... in a month the end of the world according to the Mayan calendar was supposed to occur! Yes, what these men just don't come up with ...
Only with life experience, its accumulation, will it be possible to recognize the lies and deceit of some members of the opposite sex. But it is worth remembering that the phrase about "unworthiness" is a litmus test of a cheap excuse.
"I am not worthy of you!" - when do men say such a phrase?
This is usually the real excuse for rejecting a woman. This is the easiest way to say, and it sounds beautiful (but this is only at first glance). Because if a woman is really needed and loved, then a man will do everything to be worthy, he will try to correspond, he will conquer her. Love is not so easy to give up. This is a banal excuse to get off the train.
Basically, this phrase is said by those men who want to leave the girl less painlessly, causing little pain and suffering. I am not worthy of you - this phrase can sit inside a man when he realizes that this beauty is too tough for him and he cannot afford, and in a disappointed state he says it to himself.
I have a whiner I know who says this to almost every girl he meets. It’s just a matter of horribly low self-esteem. It seems that he just wants to be dissuaded from this, but usually the girls try to prove to him a couple of times that he is quite a good guy, and then they forget about this business and leave him. Few people like to be around such a person ...
But in some cases, guys are trying to soften the breakup in this way. This is a kind of masculine version of the female phrase: We need to part, but it's not about you, it's about me. This is how women usually act when they stop loving a man, but purely human sympathy for him remains, and I do not want to ruin his pride with the message that she is leaving for another.
So you can say when you want to leave the girl, but you cannot name the reason for leaving. Saying that you don’t love her is very difficult, it can hurt her feelings. And the words I am not worthy of you; allow you to gracefully get out of a difficult situation. The man says that the girl is so good and beautiful that he is simply unworthy to be with her and therefore leaves. A less traumatic option for female pride.
When a guy says the phrase I am not worthy of you he can really think so. But sometimes it’s just “smart guy” Thus, he kind of makes it clear to the woman that he is not so bad and leaves, but he is just so terrible and at the same time so good that he wants to make her happy, protecting from himself such a “bad”. Sometimes the husband does not want to hurt his wife and sincerely uttering such a phrase, he wants to make it clear to his wife that they are not on the way, that his feelings have faded. That he wants to leave.
True, they think so, they may not be in a hurry to leave, but they are not going to start a family with this woman and hope that this woman will find a more worthy candidate for life, but so far this candidate is not found, they brighten up female loneliness.
But, it is possible that they love, but for some reason they do not want to marry.
Saying such a phrase, a man wants not only to leave beautifully, but when leaving not to offend a woman. Most likely, there are no feelings, although there are situations when a man really loves, but there are some reasons why two cannot be together. Therefore, in order not to explain anything, it is easier to say that he is not worthy. Perhaps a man has problems in which he does not want to involve his beloved woman. But such situations are rare.
When they want to fade beautifully! It is in such situations that they say so.
In fact, men have very high self-esteem and they never admit that they are worse than others in something. If he says so, most likely he wants to leave and is afraid of offending. If I really was not worthy, but loved, I would try to become better, more worthy.
7 signs that a guy isn't worthy of your attention
Every girl needs to know the signs that a guy is not worthy of her attention. Dating a guy like that will make you unhappy because they will suck the life out of you in one way or another. If you have already started dating a guy unworthy of your attention, rather leave him. Believe me, you deserve the best. A girl looking for true love shouldn't put up with this behavior.
He demands all your attention
If a guy is too clingy, this is the first sign that he is not worthy of you. Such a guy is easy to recognize, because he does not leave you for a minute, 24 hours a day. In those rare moments when he is still not with you, he interrupts your phone with calls and bombards you with messages. This type of guy is emotionally needy, he will only be happy when you are around, and pout when you are apart. Avoid these guys, because they will demand that you give them all your free time and you will not have a minute for yourself.
He often disappears
If your boyfriend often disappears and does not make himself felt for days or weeks, then it's time to say goodbye. These days it takes less than a minute to call or text, so stop putting up with this behavior if it happens on a regular basis. A guy who is in a serious relationship does not have to track down, because he is always in touch with you.
He emotionally abuses you.
Another sign of this guy is emotional abuse. Emotional abuse takes many forms, such as criticism, humiliation, insults, belittling. If your boyfriend makes you feel bad, leave him. Such a guy will destroy your self-esteem and undermine your self-confidence.
He is interrogating
It's okay if your friend is often interested in your life, but if it looks like an interrogation, consider whether it is worth being with him. The investigator guy is not sure of himself, and he will investigate in detail every hour of your life, looking for signs of suspicious behavior. Even when you were completely honest and sincere with him, he will accuse you of deception. This type of guy believes that all girls are cheating, and nothing you say will change his opinion.
He makes little effort for relationships.
A relationship with a guy who makes little effort for your union can lead to your emotional drain from the fact that only you are doing everything to keep the relationship afloat. Relationships require two people to work, only then people will be happy and contented. It's unfair for a guy to shift the responsibility onto your shoulders. If he doesn't want to work on a relationship, then you shouldn't even think about such a guy.
He has a relationship, but not with you
If you go on dates with a guy who every time comes up with new excuses why he cannot be with you, then he is clearly not worthy of you. Usually these guys already have someone, and they are in a long-term relationship. You may hear from him that he cannot leave the family because of the children, or that the divorce is not over yet. The worst thing that he can tell you is that he is still in love with Her and cannot choose between the two of you. If he is ready to end his long-term relationship, he will end up and be with you!
He is emotionally unavailable
This is the guy who keeps his emotions under lock and key from his partner. Such a guy is not worthy of your attention, because he will never be able to give you the relationship that you are looking for. He will shy away from any serious commitments, and find a bunch of reasons for this. Perhaps he is afraid to devote himself to one girl for life, or he is still healing his broken heart, or he simply does not want a serious relationship.
Alicia Gadovskaya »Blog Archive» If a man says: "I am not worthy of you ..."
If a man says: “I am not worthy of you, I am such a scoundrel, a loser, a stupid creature, who doesn’t know how and does not mean anything in this world…. And you are an angel who needs to be protected from adversity and curses, protected from insults and evil tongues ... ”- you know, he means something completely different. He does not know how to tell you that you are an unnecessary object in his life, that he does not want to protect or protect you. He's not a loser. He's an ordinary sly.
Have pity on the poor man, do not humiliate yourself, do not raise his self-esteem, because this will not lead to anything, it will only embitter him and exalt him to new "deeds" in order to prove to you his insignificance, to show himself in the role of a super loser.
Let him believe in your “ingenuity”, tell him comforting words: “If the wind strives for new horizons, neither the sun's rays, nor the warm waves of the coastal pulse, nor the free heights of the sky will hold back his gusts. Fly and don't come back. After all, everything that goes into the past has the right to be only a memory "
What kind of memory is up to you ...
Alicia Gadovskaya
This is often because women tend to idealize their partner, especially at the beginning of a relationship. Instead of critically assessing him, the young lady, wearing rose-colored glasses, persistently ignores, almost from the very beginning, saying that a man does not suit her.
Elena Kuznetsova, director of the Vladimir agency “I and You,” a consultant on interpersonal relations, family psychologist, named eight signs that may indicate that you are dating an unsuitable gentleman, and it is pointless to make plans with him.
1. You caught him in a lie
Of course, there is a lie for the good, but now we are not talking about it. We are considering a situation where a man fell for a lie that would undermine a woman's confidence. Elena Kuznetsova advises ladies to forgive their partner for the first time and give him a second chance. If the man does not justify expectations and a second time, then he must be separated from him. A liar is a diagnosis. are unlikely to be durable.
“Don't chop off the shoulder. If, nevertheless, an unpleasant situation occurred for you, try to understand everything and be as fair as possible. It is important to abstract from "me and you", "mine is yours." Only after weighing all the pros and cons, make a decision on whether or not to part with him, ”the psychologist states.
2. Eternal savior
If a woman constantly has to pull a man out of any troubles, save him from alcoholism, debts, unreliable company, then a partner is definitely not suitable for her. He will be hers. This is if we are talking about a normal, loving family. A woman aiming at parity, partnership and not ready to accept the eternal role of the savior.
On the other hand, there are ladies who deliberately choose to take care of them like little boys and shine against their background. There are ladies who carry the entire family burden on themselves, but they endure such a situation, because they have become accustomed to it since childhood.
“When a woman drags everything on her shoulders, it’s wrong. But if at the same time she tolerates such a situation, it means that she needs it. So she lives with the right man for her. But when there is not enough patience, you have to part and look for someone with whom you can build partnerships, ”says Kuznetsova.
3. You are not a priority for him
We are not talking about a couple, in which they provide a good family, but do not have the opportunity to pay enough attention to their woman. We are talking about a man who is not able to earn enough, but who is rarely at home. He may disappear at work, with friends, at the gym, etc. Any other business, but not his woman, turns out to be a priority. Such a man finds time for everything, except for his partner. This type of representative of the stronger sex, and the woman for him will always be on the sidelines. Such a relationship will not suit a normal woman. Perhaps only the one that was originally brought up in a family where it was customary to spread rot, humiliate each other and disregard anyone's interests.
4. Poor treatment of service personnel
A normal woman would hardly want to see a rude, arrogant next to her. But this type is precisely the representatives of the stronger sex, who are not too polite with service personnel, for example, with waitresses. If in relation to you the gentleman did not allow himself "anything like that", do not flatter yourself. It is the matter of time. Perhaps during the course he will restrain himself and take out his displeasure on the janitors, salesmen or waitresses, but in the future he will behave in an impartial way with you. There is no point in hoping for an exception.
5. Always dissatisfied with everything
The endless negativity that comes from your man will ultimately get you killed. You will get tired of listening to your partner's eternal muttering, seeing his displeased face and listening to his critical remarks. Grouch is a diagnosis. Over time, the character of your man will only get heavy, and the man will take out all his dissatisfaction with life on the woman with tripled strength.
6. Everyone is against your relationship
If you like your partner, but your close circle speaks out against him, you must, first of all, listen to yourself and defend your loved one. However, if the criticism comes from people you trust, you should listen to what you are told. It is possible that you simply do not notice the obvious things that indicate that your partner is not treating you so well.
If the arguments that relatives and friends bring against your chosen one are reasoned and logical, it is worth taking advice on board and taking a closer look at your partner. What if he really isn't who he says he is?
7. Not love
If you are the type of woman whose, and other aspects are not taken into account, then it makes no sense to be with someone who does not make you want. If you, and pay attention to the actions of a man, then do not rush to part with a partner. Your relationship may not be as passionate as you might like, but based on mutual respect, compromise, and a comfortable life, it can hold great promise.
8. Your relationship is too stiff
An optimistic young lady is unlikely to be able to hold out for a long time with a pessimist and a bore. If a relationship lacks humor and lightness, this is a bad symptom. When there is no reason that would "cover" the lack of some recklessness in a couple, then most likely you are dating the wrong man for you. Over time, his tediousness will become more and more annoying, and the relationship will still come to a standstill.
Think twice
If any of the above signs apply to your pair, take your time. Elena Kuznetsova advises to maintain a relationship as long as there is at least a little good in them, as long as you like something in your man. Moreover, you have no one to replace him yet.
Helpful information
Elena Kuznetsova, director of the Vladimir dating agency "Me and you", family psychologist. Phone 8-920-909-62-35. Call on weekdays from 11:00 to 19:00“I would recommend staying with the person as long as he suits you in some way. As long as there is something about your partner that you like, it would be blasphemous to leave him. At least until there is no alternative. We are all imperfect. , and getting used to it is daunting. We are constantly weighing the pros and cons. But nevertheless, it is worth making a decision in favor of “against” only when there is complete antagonism in the pair. In all other cases, it makes sense to hold on to the man who is next to you now, ”the psychologist believes.
Measure seven times - cut one. When it comes to relationships, you need to “measure” not seven times, but a hundred, Kuznetsova is sure.
If you want to suggest your own topics related to interpersonal relationships, write to the address of the editorial office of "AiF-Vladimir": .
