Confession is not a conversation about one’s shortcomings, doubts, it is not simply informing one’s confessor about oneself. Confession is a sacrament, and not just a pious custom. Confession is an ardent repentance of the heart, a thirst for purification that comes from the feeling of holiness, this is the second Baptism, and, therefore, in repentance we die to sin and are resurrected to holiness. Repentance is the first degree of holiness, and insensibility is being outside of holiness, outside of God.
Answers to frequently asked questions about confession
Often, instead of confessing one’s sins, there is self-praise, denunciation of loved ones and complaints about the difficulties of life.
How to prepare for your first confession?
Some confessors strive to go through confession painlessly for themselves - they say general phrases: “I am a sinner in everything” or talk about little things, keeping silent about what should really weigh on the conscience. The reason for this is false shame in front of the confessor, and indecision, but especially the cowardly fear of seriously starting to understand one’s life, which is full of small, habitual weaknesses and sins.
Sin is a violation of the Christian moral law. Therefore, the holy Apostle and Evangelist John the Theologian gives the following definition of sin: “Everyone who commits sin also commits lawlessness” (1 John 3:4).
There are sins against God and His Church. This group includes numerous spiritual states connected in a continuous network, which include, along with the simple and obvious, a large number of hidden, seemingly innocent, but in fact the most dangerous phenomena for the soul. Generally speaking, these sins can be reduced to the following: 1) lack of faith, 2) superstition, 3) blasphemy and idolatry, 4) lack of prayer and neglect of church services, 5) delusion.
Lack of faith. This sin is perhaps the most common, and literally every Christian has to struggle with it continuously. Lack of faith often imperceptibly turns into complete unbelief, and the person suffering from it often continues to attend divine services and resort to confession. He does not consciously deny the existence of God, however, he doubts His omnipotence, mercy or Providence. With his actions, affections, and his entire way of life, he contradicts the faith he professes in words. Such a person never delved into even the simplest dogmatic issues, fearing to lose those naive ideas about Christianity, often incorrect and primitive, that he once acquired. By turning Orthodoxy into a national, home tradition, a set of external rituals, gestures, or reducing it to the enjoyment of beautiful choral singing, the flickering of candles, that is, to external splendor, people of little faith lose the most important thing in the Church - our Lord Jesus Christ. For a person of little faith, religiosity is closely connected with aesthetic, passionate, and sentimental emotions; she easily gets along with egoism, vanity, and sensuality. People of this type seek praise and good opinion confessor about them. They come to the lectern to complain about others, they are full of themselves and strive to demonstrate their “righteousness” in every possible way. The superficiality of their religious enthusiasm is best demonstrated by their easy transition from cloyingly ostentatious “piety” to irritability and anger at their neighbors.
Such a person does not admit any sins, does not even bother trying to understand his life and sincerely believes that he does not see anything sinful in it.
In fact, such “righteous people” often show callousness towards others, are selfish and hypocritical; They live only for themselves, considering abstinence from sins sufficient for salvation. It is useful to remind yourself of the contents of chapter 25 of the Gospel of Matthew (the parables of the ten virgins, the talents and, especially, the description of the Last Judgment). In general, religious complacency and complacency are the main signs of alienation from God and the Church, and this is most clearly shown in another gospel parable - about the publican and the Pharisee.
Superstition. Often all kinds of superstitions, belief in omens, divination, fortune telling on cards, and various heretical ideas about sacraments and rituals penetrate and spread among believers.
Such superstitions are contrary to the teachings of the Orthodox Church and serve to corrupt souls and extinguish faith.
Particular attention should be paid to such a fairly widespread and destructive doctrine for the soul as occultism, magic, etc. On the faces of people who have been engaged in the so-called occult sciences for a long time, initiated into the “secret spiritual teaching,” a heavy imprint remains - a sign of unconfessed sin, and in souls there is a painfully distorted view of Christianity as one of the lower stages of knowledge of the truth, painfully distorted by satanic rationalistic pride. Suppressing the childishly sincere faith in the paternal love of God, the hope for the Resurrection and Eternal Life, occultists preach the doctrine of “karma”, the transmigration of souls, extra-church and, therefore, graceless asceticism. Such unfortunates, if they have found the strength to repent, should be explained that, in addition to direct harm to mental health, activities in the occult are caused by a curious desire to look behind a closed door. We must humbly acknowledge the existence of the Mystery without trying to penetrate into it through non-church ways. We have been given the supreme law of life, we have been shown the path that directly leads us to God - love. And we must follow this path, bearing our cross, without turning to detours. Occultism is never able to reveal the secrets of existence, as their adherents claim.
Blasphemy and desecration. These sins often coexist with churchliness and sincere faith. This primarily includes blasphemous grumbling against God for His supposedly unmerciful attitude towards man, for suffering that seems excessive and undeserved to him. Sometimes it even comes to blasphemy against God, church shrines, and sacraments. This often manifests itself in the telling of irreverent or directly offensive stories from the lives of clergy and monks, in mocking, ironic quoting of individual expressions from the Holy Scriptures or from prayer books.
The custom of deification and commemoration in vain of the Name of God or Holy Mother of God. It is very difficult to get rid of the habit of using these sacred names in everyday conversations as interjections, which are used to give the phrase greater emotional expressiveness: “God be with him!”, “Oh, Lord!” etc. It is even worse to pronounce the Name of God in jokes, and an absolutely terrible sin is committed by the one who uses sacred words in anger, during a quarrel, that is, along with curses and insults. The one who threatens his enemies with the wrath of the Lord or even in “prayer” asks God to punish another person also blasphemes. A great sin is committed by parents who curse their children in their hearts and threaten them with heavenly punishment. Summoning evil spirits(cursing) in anger or in simple conversation is also sinful. The use of any swear words is also blasphemy and a grave sin.
Neglect of church services. This sin most often manifests itself in the lack of desire to participate in the sacrament of the Eucharist, that is, long-term deprivation of oneself from the Communion of the Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ in the absence of any circumstances preventing this; in addition, this is a general lack of church discipline, a dislike for worship. The excuses usually given are being busy with official and everyday affairs, the distance of the church from home, the length of the service, and the incomprehensibility of the liturgical Church Slavonic language. Some attend divine services quite carefully, but at the same time they only attend the liturgy, do not receive communion and do not even pray during the service. Sometimes you have to deal with such sad facts as ignorance of the basic prayers and the Creed, misunderstanding of the meaning of the sacraments performed, and most importantly, a lack of interest in this.
Prayerlessness, as a special case of unchurchism, is a common sin. Fervent prayer distinguishes sincere believers from “lukewarm” believers. We must strive not to scold the prayer rule, not to defend the divine services, we must acquire the gift of prayer from the Lord, fall in love with prayer, and look forward to the hour of prayer. Gradually entering into the element of prayer under the guidance of a confessor, a person learns to love and understand the music of Church Slavonic chants, their incomparable beauty and depth; the colorfulness and mystical imagery of liturgical symbols - all that is called church splendor.
The gift of prayer is the ability to control oneself, one’s attention, to repeat the words of prayer not only with lips and tongue, but also to participate in prayer with all one’s heart and all one’s thoughts. An excellent means for this is the “Jesus Prayer,” which consists of uniform, repeated, leisurely repetition of the words: “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.” There is extensive ascetic literature about this prayer exercise, collected mainly in the Philokalia and other paternal works.
The “Jesus Prayer” is especially good because it does not require the creation of a special external environment; it can be read while walking down the street, while working, in the kitchen, on the train, etc. In these cases, it especially helps to divert our attention from everything seductive, vain, vulgar, empty and concentrate the mind and heart on the sweetest Name of God. True, one should not begin “spiritual work” without the blessing and guidance of an experienced confessor, since such self-inflicted work can lead to a false mystical state of delusion.
Spiritual delusion is significantly different from all the listed sins against God and the Church. Unlike them, this sin is not rooted in a lack of faith, religiosity, or churchliness, but, on the contrary, in a false sense of excess of personal spiritual gifts. A person in a state of seduction imagines himself as having achieved special fruits of spiritual perfection, which is confirmed by all sorts of “signs” for him: dreams, voices, waking visions. Such a person may be very gifted mystically, but in the absence of church culture and theological education, and most importantly, due to the absence of a good, strict confessor and the presence of an environment inclined to gullibly perceive his tales as revelations, such a person often acquires many supporters, as a result of which Most sectarian anti-church movements arose.
This usually begins with a story about a mysterious dream, unusually chaotic and with a claim to a mystical revelation or prophecy. In the next stage, someone in a similar state, according to him, already hears voices in reality or sees shining visions in which he recognizes an angel or some saint, or even the Mother of God and the Savior Himself. They tell him the most incredible revelations, often completely meaningless. This happens to people who are both poorly educated and those who are very well-read in the Holy Scriptures, patristic works, as well as those who devote themselves to “smart work” without pastoral guidance.
Gluttony- one of a number of sins against neighbors, family and society. It manifests itself in the habit of immoderate, excessive consumption of food, that is, overeating or in an addiction to refined taste sensations, enjoying oneself with food. Certainly, different people You need different amounts of food to maintain your physical strength - this depends on age, physique, state of health, as well as the severity of the work the person performs. There is no sin in the food itself, for it is a gift from God. The sin lies in treating it as a desired goal, in worshiping it, in the voluptuous experience of taste sensations, in conversations on this topic, in the desire to spend as much money as possible on new, even more refined products. Every piece of food eaten beyond satisfying hunger, every sip of moisture after quenching thirst, simply for pleasure, is already gluttony. Sitting at the table, a Christian must not allow himself to be carried away by this passion. “The more wood, the stronger the flame; the more dishes, the more violent the lust” (Abba Leontius). “Gluttony is the mother of fornication,” says one ancient patericon. And St. John Climacus directly warns: “Control your womb before it dominates you.”
St. Augustine compares the body to a furious horse that carries away the soul, the unbridledness of which should be tamed by reducing food; It is primarily for this purpose that the Church established fasts. But “beware of measuring fasting by simple abstinence from food,” says St. Basil the Great. “Those who abstain from food and behave badly are like the devil, who, although he does not eat anything, nevertheless does not stop sinning.” During fasting, it is necessary—and this is the main thing—to curb your thoughts, feelings, and impulses. The meaning of spiritual fasting is best described in one Lenten stichera: “Let us fast with a pleasant fast, pleasing to the Lord: true fasting is alienation of the evil, abstinence of the tongue, putting aside rage, excommunication from lusts, speaking, lying and perjury: these are impoverished, true fasting is also favorable.” . No matter how difficult fasting may be in the conditions of our life, we must strive for it, we must maintain it in everyday life, especially internal, spiritual fasting, which the fathers call chastity. The sister and friend of fasting is prayer, without which it turns into an end in itself, a means of special, refined care for one’s body.
Obstacles to prayer come from weak, incorrect, insufficient faith, from over-concern, vanity, preoccupation with worldly affairs, from sinful, unclean, evil feelings and thoughts. Fasting helps overcome these obstacles.
Love of money manifests itself in the form of extravagance or its opposite, stinginess. Secondary at first glance, this is a sin of extreme importance - it involves the simultaneous rejection of faith in God, love for people and addiction to lower feelings. It gives rise to anger, petrification, over-concern, and envy. Overcoming the love of money is a partial overcoming of these sins. From the words of the Savior Himself, we know that it is difficult for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of God. Christ teaches: “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:19-21). St. Apostle Paul says: “We brought nothing into the world; It’s obvious that we can’t take anything out of it. Having food and clothing, we will be content with that. But those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and harmful lusts that plunge people into disaster and destruction. For the root of all evil is the love of money, to which some have abandoned the faith and subjected themselves to many sorrows. You, man of God, run away from this...Admonish the rich in this age not to think highly of themselves and to trust not in unfaithful wealth, but in the Living God, who gives us everything abundantly for our enjoyment; so that they do good, be rich in good deeds, be generous and sociable, laying up for themselves treasure, a good foundation for the future, in order to achieve eternal life” (1 Tim. 6, 7-11; 17-19).
“The wrath of man does not bring about the righteousness of God” (James 1:20). Anger, irritability - many penitents tend to justify the manifestation of this passion with physiological reasons, the so-called “nervousness” due to the suffering and hardships that befell them, tension modern life, difficult character of relatives and friends. Although these reasons are partly true, they cannot justify this, as a rule, deep-rooted habit of taking out one’s irritation, anger, and bad mood on loved ones. Irritability, temper, and rudeness primarily destroy family life, leading to quarrels over trifles, causing retaliatory hatred, desire for revenge, rancor, harden the hearts of generally good and loving friend people's friend. And how destructively the manifestation of anger affects young souls, destroying in them the God-given tenderness and love for their parents! “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, lest they become discouraged” (Col. 3:21).
The ascetic works of the Church Fathers contain a lot of advice for combating the passion of anger. One of the most effective is “righteous anger,” in other words, turning our capacity for irritation and anger to the very passion of anger. “It is not only permissible, but truly salutary to be angry at one’s own sins and shortcomings” (St. Demetrius of Rostov). St. Nilus of Sinai advises to be “meek with people,” but lovingly loving our enemies, since this is the natural use of anger to hostilely confront the ancient serpent” (“Philokalia,” vol. II). The same ascetic writer says: “Whoever bears a grudge against demons does not hold a grudge against people.”
You should show meekness and patience towards your neighbors. “Be wise, and stop the lips of those who speak evil about you with silence, and not with anger and abuse” (St. Anthony the Great). “When they slander you, see if you have done anything worthy of slander. If you haven’t done it, then consider slander as flying away smoke” (St. Nilus of Sinai). “When you feel a strong influx of anger within yourself, try to remain silent. And so that silence itself will bring you more benefit, turn mentally to God and read mentally to yourself at this time some short prayers, for example, the “Jesus Prayer,” advises St. Philaret of Moscow. It is even necessary to argue without bitterness and without anger, since irritation is immediately transferred to another, infecting him, but in no case convincing him that he is right.
Very often the cause of anger is arrogance, pride, the desire to show one’s power over others, to expose one’s vices, forgetting about one’s own sins. “Eliminate two thoughts in yourself: do not recognize yourself as worthy of anything great and do not think that another person is much lower in dignity than you. In this case, the insults inflicted on us will never lead us to irritation” (St. Basil the Great).
In confession, we must tell whether we harbor anger towards our neighbor and whether we have reconciled with the one with whom we quarreled, and if we cannot see someone in person, have we reconciled with him in our hearts? On Athos, confessors not only do not allow monks who have anger towards their neighbors to serve in church and partake of the Holy Mysteries, but when reading the prayer rule, they must omit the words in the Lord’s Prayer: “and forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” so as not to be liars before God. With this prohibition, the monk is temporarily excommunicated from prayerful and Eucharistic communion with the Church, until reconciliation with his brother.
The one who prays for those who often lead him into the temptation of anger receives significant help. Thanks to such prayer, a feeling of meekness and love for people who were recently hated is instilled in the heart. But in the first place there should be a prayer for the granting of meekness and driving away the spirit of anger, revenge, resentment, and rancor.
One of the most common sins is, undoubtedly, judging one’s neighbor. Many do not even realize that they have sinned countless times, and if they do, they believe that this phenomenon is so widespread and ordinary that it does not even deserve mention in confession. In fact, this sin is the beginning and root of many other sinful habits.
First of all, this sin is in close connection with the passion of pride. Condemning other people's shortcomings (real or apparent), a person imagines himself better, purer, more pious, more honest or smarter than another. The words of Abba Isaiah are addressed to such people: “Whoever has a pure heart considers all people pure, but whoever has a heart defiled by passions does not consider anyone pure, but thinks that everyone is like him” (“Spiritual Flower Garden”).
Those who condemn forget that the Savior Himself commanded: “Judge not, lest ye be judged, for with the judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not feel the plank in your own eye?” (Matt. 7:1-3). “Let us no longer judge each other, but rather judge how not to give your brother any chance of stumbling or temptation” (Rom. 14:13), teaches St. Apostle Paul. There is no sin committed by one person that anyone else could not commit. And if you see someone else’s uncleanness, then it means that it has already penetrated into you, for innocent babies do not notice the depravity of adults and thereby maintain their chastity. Therefore, the condemner, even if he is right, must honestly admit to himself: has he not committed the same sin?
Our judgment is never impartial, because most often it is based on a random impression or is carried out under the influence of personal resentment, irritation, anger, or a random “mood.”
If a Christian has heard about the unseemly act of his loved one, then, before being indignant and condemning him, he must act according to the words of Jesus son of Sirach: “He who bridles the tongue will live peacefully, and he who hates talkativeness will reduce evil. Never repeat a word, and you will lose nothing... Ask your friend, maybe he didn’t do that; and if he did, then let him not do it forward. Ask your friend, maybe he didn’t say that; and if he said it, let him not repeat it. Ask a friend, for slander often occurs. Don't believe every word. Someone sins in word, but not from the heart; and who has not sinned with his tongue? Question your neighbor before threatening him, and give place to the law of the Most High” (Sir. 19, 6-8; 13-19).
The sin of despondency most often occurs from excessive preoccupation with oneself, one’s experiences, failures and, as a result, the fading of love for others, indifference to other people’s suffering, inability to rejoice in other people’s joys, envy. The basis and root of our spiritual life and strength is love for Christ, and we need to grow and cultivate it in ourselves. To peer into His image, to clarify and deepen it within oneself, to live in thought of Him, and not about one’s small, vain blows and failures, to give one’s heart to Him—this is the life of a Christian. And then the silence and peace that St. speaks about will reign in our hearts. Isaac the Syrian: “Make peace with yourself, and heaven and earth will make peace with you.”
There is, perhaps, no sin more common than lying. This category of vices should also include failure to fulfill promises, gossip and idle talk. This sin has entered so deeply into the consciousness of modern man, so deeply rooted in the souls that people do not even think that any form of untruth, insincerity, hypocrisy, exaggeration, boasting is a manifestation of serious sin, serving Satan - the father of lies. According to the Apostle John, “no one devoted to abomination and lies will enter the Heavenly Jerusalem” (Rev. 21:27). Our Lord said about Himself: “I am the way and the truth and the life” (John 14:6), and therefore you can come to Him only by walking along the path of righteousness. Only truth makes people free.
A lie can manifest itself completely shamelessly, openly, in all its satanic abomination, becoming in such cases a person’s second nature, a permanent mask attached to his face. He gets so used to lying that he cannot express his thoughts otherwise than by putting them into words that obviously do not correspond to them, thereby not clarifying, but darkening the truth. Lies imperceptibly creep into a person’s soul from childhood: often, not wanting to see anyone, we ask our loved ones to tell the person who comes that we are not at home; Instead of directly refusing to participate in any activity that is unpleasant for us, we pretend to be sick and busy with something else. Such “everyday” lies, seemingly innocent exaggerations, jokes based on deception, gradually corrupt a person, allowing him subsequently to make deals with his conscience for his own benefit.
Just as nothing can come from the devil except evil and destruction for the soul, so nothing can come from lies - his brainchild - except the corrupting, satanic, anti-Christian spirit of evil. There is no “saving lie” or “justified”; these phrases themselves are blasphemous, for only the Truth, our Lord, saves and justifies us.
No less common than lies is the sin of idle talk, that is, the empty, unspiritual use of the Divine gift of speech. This also includes gossip and retelling of rumors.
Often people spend time in empty, useless conversations, the content of which is immediately forgotten, instead of talking about faith with someone who suffers without it, seeking God, visiting the sick, helping the lonely, praying, comforting the offended, talking with children or grandchildren , instruct them with words and personal example on the spiritual path.
In the prayer of St. Ephraim the Syrian says: “...Do not give me the spirit of idleness, despondency, covetousness and idle talk.” During Lent and fasting, one must be especially focused on the spiritual, give up entertainment (cinema, theater, television), be careful in words, truthful. It is appropriate to once again recall the words of the Lord: “For every idle word that people speak, they will give an answer on the day of judgment: for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned” (Matthew 12: 36-37).
We must carefully and chastely handle the priceless gifts of speech and reason, for they unite us with the Divine Logos Himself, the Incarnate Word - with our Lord Jesus Christ.
The most terrible sin at all times was the violation of the sixth commandment - murder- deprivation of another greatest gift of the Lord - life. The same terrible sins are suicide and murder in the womb - abortion.
Those who, in anger at their neighbor, commit assault, inflicting beatings, wounds, and mutilations, are very close to committing murder. Parents are guilty of this sin, cruelly treating their children, beating them for the slightest offense, or even without any reason. Those who, through gossip, slander, and slander, aroused anger in a person against someone else and, even more so, incited him to physically deal with him, are also guilty of this sin. This is often the sin of mothers-in-law towards their daughters-in-law, and neighbors who make false accusations against a woman who is temporarily separated from her husband, deliberately causing scenes of jealousy that end in beatings.
Timely failure to provide assistance to a sick person, a dying person—in general, indifference to the suffering of others should also be considered as passive murder. This kind of attitude towards elderly sick parents on the part of children is especially terrible.
This also includes failure to provide assistance to a person in trouble: homeless, hungry, drowning before your eyes, beaten or robbed, victim of a fire or flood.
But we kill our neighbor not only with our hands or weapons, but also with cruel words, abuse, mockery, and mockery of the grief of others. The Holy Apostle John says: “Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer” (1 John 3:15). Everyone has experienced how an evil, cruel, caustic word hurts and kills the soul.
No less sin is committed by those who deprive young souls of honor and innocence, corrupting them physically or morally, pushing them onto the path of depravity and sin. St. Augustine says: “Do not think that you are not a murderer if you have caused your neighbor to sin. You corrupt the soul of the seduced and steal from him what belongs to eternity.” Inviting a young man or girl to a drunken gathering, inciting to avenge grievances, seducing with depraved sights or stories, dissuading people from fasting, engaging in pimping, providing one’s home for drunkenness and depraved gatherings - all this is complicity in the moral murder of one’s neighbor.
Killing animals without the need for food, torturing them is also a violation of the sixth commandment. “The righteous man cares for the life of his livestock, but the heart of the wicked is hard” (Proverbs 12:10).
By indulging in excessive sadness, driving ourselves to despair, we sin against the same commandment. Suicide is the greatest sin, for life is a gift from God, and only He has the power to deprive us of it. Refusal of treatment, deliberate non-compliance with doctor’s orders, deliberate harm to one’s health through excessive drinking of wine or smoking tobacco is also slow suicide. Some kill themselves by working too hard to get rich - this is also a sin.
The Holy Church, her holy fathers and teachers, condemning abortion and considering it a sin, proceed from the idea that people should not thoughtlessly neglect the sacred gift of life. This is the meaning of all church prohibitions on the issue of abortion. At the same time, the Church recalls the words of the Apostle Paul that “a woman... will be saved through childbearing if she continues in faith and love and in holiness with chastity” (1 Tim. 2:14.15).
A woman who is outside the Church is warned against this act by medical workers, explaining the danger and moral impurity of this operation. For a woman who recognizes her involvement in the Orthodox Church (and, apparently, every baptized woman who comes to church for confession should be considered such), artificial termination of pregnancy is unacceptable.
Some consider violation of the commandment “thou shalt not steal” only obvious theft and robbery with the use of violence, when large items are taken sums of money or other material assets, and therefore, without hesitation, they deny their guilt in the sin of theft. However, theft is any illegal appropriation of someone else's property, both one's own and public. Theft (theft) should be considered non-repayment of monetary debts or things given for a time. No less reprehensible is parasitism, begging unless absolutely necessary, when it is possible to earn your own food. If a person, taking advantage of the misfortune of another, takes more from him than he should, then he commits the sin of extortion. The concept of extortion also includes the resale of food and industrial products at inflated prices (speculation). Traveling without a ticket on public transport is also an act that should be considered a violation of the eighth commandment.
Sins against the seventh commandment by their very nature they are especially widespread, tenacious, and therefore the most dangerous. They are associated with one of the strongest human instincts - sexual. Sensuality has deeply penetrated the fallen nature of man and can manifest itself in the most varied and sophisticated forms. Patristic asceticism teaches us to fight against all sin from its very smallest appearance, not only with the already obvious manifestations of carnal sin, but with lustful thoughts, dreams, fantasies, for “everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matt. 5:28). Here approximate diagram development of this sin in us.
Prodigal thoughts, developing from memories of something previously seen, heard, or even experienced in a dream. In solitude, often at night, they overwhelm a person especially strongly. Here the best medicine is ascetic exercises: fasting in food, not lying in bed after waking up, regular reading of the morning and evening prayer rules.
Seductive conversations in society, obscene stories, jokes told with the desire to please others and be the center of their attention. Many young people, in order not to show their “backwardness” and not to be ridiculed by their comrades, fall into this sin. This also includes singing immoral songs, writing obscene words, as well as using them in conversation. All this leads to vicious self-indulgence, which is all the more dangerous because, firstly, it is associated with intense work of the imagination, and secondly, it haunts the unfortunate person so relentlessly that he gradually becomes a slave to this sin, which destroys his physical health and paralyzes his will. to overcome vice.
Fornication— unsanctified by the grace-filled power of the sacrament of Marriage, copulation between a single man and an unmarried woman (or violation of the chastity of a young man and a girl before marriage).
Adultery- violation of marital fidelity by one of the spouses.
Incest- carnal connection between close relatives.
Unnatural sexual relations: sodomy, lesbianism, bestiality.
The heinousness of the listed sins hardly needs to be discussed in detail. Their inadmissibility is obvious to every Christian: they lead to spiritual death even before a person’s physical death.
All men and women who repent, if they are in an unregistered relationship, should be strongly encouraged to legalize their relationship, no matter what age they are. In addition, in marriage one should observe chastity, not indulge in excess in carnal pleasures, and refrain from cohabitation during fasting, on the eve of Sundays and holidays.
Our repentance will not be complete if, while repenting, we do not confirm internally in the determination not to return to the confessed sin. But they ask how this is possible, how can I promise myself and my confessor that I will not repeat my sin? Wouldn't the opposite be closer to the truth—the conviction that sin is repeated? After all, everyone knows from experience that after a while you inevitably return to the same sins; observing yourself from year to year, you do not notice any improvement.
It would be terrible if that were the case. But fortunately, this is not so. There is no case when, in the presence of sincere repentance and a good desire to improve, Holy Communion received with faith does not produce good changes in the soul. The point is that, first of all, we are not our own judges. A person cannot correctly judge himself whether he has become worse or better, since both he himself and what he judges are changing quantities. Increased severity towards oneself, increased spiritual vision can give the illusion that sins have multiplied and intensified. In fact, they remained the same, maybe even weakened, but we didn’t notice them that much before. In addition, God, in His special Providence, often closes our eyes to our successes in order to protect us from the worst sin - vanity and pride. It often happens that sin still remains, but frequent confession and communion of the Holy Mysteries have shaken and weakened its roots. Yes, the very struggle with sin, suffering about your sins - isn’t this an acquisition?! “Do not be afraid, even if you fall every day and depart from the paths of God, stand courageously, and the angel guarding you will honor your patience,” said St. John Climacus.
Nurturing the Heart
what to say in confession - sermon by Metropolitan Anthony of Sourozh
Fragment of a general confession
Conversation before confession
priest Alexander Elchaninov
I confess to the Lord my God before you, honest father, all my countless sins that I have committed up to this day and hour: in deed, in word, in thought. Every day and every hour I sin ingratitude to God for His great and countless benefits to me and all-good providence for me, a sinner.
Sinned: idle talk, condemnation, contempt, disobedience, pride, unmercifulness, envy, anger, slander, inattention, negligence, negligence, insolence, irritability, violation of the commandments of the fathers, despondency, resentment, repaying evil for evil, bitterness, disobedience, murmuring, self-justification, rebellion , self-indulgence, self-will, reproach, slander, lies, laughter, temptation, pride, ambition, gluttony, excess in food and drink: secret activities, secret drinking (drunkenness), love of things, vanity, laziness, acceptance of prodigal unclean thoughts, with pleasure and slowness in them, with voluptuous dreams and petitions.
Sinned: excessive sleeping, unclean views, omission of the Divine service due to laziness and negligence, dozing and whispering in church, being late for the start of church services, absent-mindedness in church and cell prayer, failure to strictly follow the cell monastic canon.
Sinned: deed, word, thought, sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch and my other feelings, mental and physical, for which I repent and ask for forgiveness.
(Here you need to say other sins, if you have something special in your soul).
I still repent and ask for forgiveness for everything that, due to foolishness and oblivion, I did not confess.
Forgive me and allow me, honest father, and bless me to partake of the Holy and Life-giving mysteries of Christ for the forgiveness of my sins and eternal life.
How to prepare for Holy Communion
Preparation for Holy Communion - fasting
You must prepare yourself for the Sacrament of Holy Communion by fasting, that is, by prayer, fasting, Christian-humble mood and behavior, and confession.
Home and church prayer
Anyone who wishes to worthily receive communion of the Holy Mysteries of Christ must prayerfully prepare himself for this at least a week in advance: pray more and more diligently at home in the morning and evening and, if possible, attend church services every morning and evening during the week. If service or work prevents regular attendance at all Divine services, then one must go as far as circumstances allow, and, in any case, be sure to be at the evening Divine service on the eve of the day of communion.
Fast
Fasting is combined with prayer, that is, abstinence from modest food - meat, milk, butter, eggs - and in general moderation in food: you need to eat and drink less than usual.
Mood and behavior
Anyone preparing for Holy Communion must be imbued with a deep consciousness of his sinfulness, his insignificance before God and lewdness; must make peace with everyone and protect himself from feelings of anger and irritation, refrain from condemnation and all kinds of obscene thoughts and conversations, refuse to visit places of entertainment and houses that could give rise to falling into sin. I must meditate on the greatness of the Sacrament of the Body and Blood of Christ, spending as much time as possible in solitude, reading the Word of God and books of spiritual content.
Confession
Those who wish to receive communion should, best of all, confess the day before, before and after the evening service - bring sincere repentance of their sins to the priest, sincerely opening their soul and not hiding a single sin they have committed. Before confession, you must certainly reconcile with both the offenders and the offended, humbly asking everyone for forgiveness. Forgiveness is usually asked in the following form: “Forgive me, a sinner, for sinning before you,” to which it is customary to respond: “God will forgive you, forgive me, a sinner.” During confession, it is better not to wait for the priest’s questions, but to express everything that weighs on your soul, without justifying yourself in anything and without shifting the blame onto others.
It is more correct to confess the evening before, so that the morning can be devoted to prayerful preparation for Holy Communion. As a last resort, you can confess in the morning, but certainly before the start of the Divine Liturgy, and not during it. Coming to confession when the liturgy has already begun is an extreme neglect of the great sacrament.
Having confessed, you must make a firm decision not to repeat your previous sins again.
Without confession, no one can be admitted to Holy Communion, except in cases of mortal danger.
There is a good custom - after confession and before Holy Communion, do not eat, drink or smoke. This is definitely prohibited after midnight. Children should also be taught to abstain from food and drink before Holy Communion from a very early age.
Confession (the sacrament of Repentance) in our monastery is performed daily during the morning service: from Monday to Saturday - at 7.00, on Sunday - at 6.30 and 9.00.
During Lent confession is being made on Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays at 7.00, on Sundays – at 6.30 and 9.00.
Children under 7 years old can receive communion without confession.
About the Sacrament of Repentance
In the sacrament of repentance, a Christian is given cleansing from sins committed after baptism. The repentant confesses his sins to the Lord and His Church, represented by its representative - a bishop or priest, through whose prayers the Lord forgives the confessed sins and reunites the repentant with the Church.
Every sin is a refusal of Divine light. In order to see your evil, you need to see the light or beauty of God's truth, which shone most of all in the face of the Lord Jesus Christ, in His Gospel, as well as in holy people. Therefore, one must repent before the face of the Lord, to whom the Heavenly Father gave all judgment on earth. The judgment consists in the fact that the Lord is light, and those who reject this light bear the punishment within themselves, going into darkness.
Every sin is a sin against love, since God Himself is love. Violating the law of love, every sin leads to separation from God and people, and, therefore, is a sin against the Church. Therefore, the one who sins falls away from the Church and must repent before it. In ancient times, a sinner repented before the entire church assembly; now the priest alone accepts confession on behalf of the Lord and the Church.
Sin lies not only in individual actions of a person, it is a constant illness that does not allow a person to accept the gift of Divine grace, i.e. deprives him of the source of true life. To eradicate sins such as pride or selfishness, constant attention to oneself, the fight against bad thoughts and bitter regret for frequent mistakes are required. This is constant repentance. To inhale grace, you must constantly exhale the fumes of sin. One who constantly checks himself and, at least during evening prayer, remembers his past day, repents more successfully during confession. Those who neglect daily hygiene of the soul easily fall into great sins, sometimes without even noticing them. Repentance, which precedes confession, requires, firstly, awareness of one’s sins; secondly, bitter regret for them and, finally, determination to improve.
A person who repents well also finds the reasons for sinful actions. For example, he will understand that the inability to endure and forgive insults, even the most insignificant ones, is explained by pride, with which he will fight.
The fight against sin must necessarily be expressed in revealing one’s soul to God and other people, since the root of sin is a person’s selfish self-isolation. Confession is, first of all, this way out of painful subjectivity; it also requires self-sacrifice (your pride), without which there is no true love. In addition, the story of sin, often accompanied by burning shame, helps cut off sin from the healthy core of the personality. Other diseases are incurable without a surgeon’s blade or cauterization. Confessed sin becomes alien to a person, and hidden sin produces suppuration of the entire soul. We confess not so much in order to avoid punishment, but in order to be cured of sins, that is, to get rid of their repetition. Receiving the penitent, the priest addresses him: “Be careful, you came to the hospital, do not leave here unwell.”
Sin corrupts our personality, and only Divine love can restore its integrity, that is, heal it. We come for her to the Church, where Christ Himself heals us with His love. And how can grace-filled love not flare up in the heart of a repentant when the Lord says to him: “And I do not condemn you; go and sin no more” (John 8:11), or, what is the same, when the priest says the words of the prayer of permission? The Lord gave the power to resolve sins to His Church, telling the Apostles: “Whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven” (Matthew 18:18).
The preparation for confession is, firstly, a person’s spiritual life, with constant exercise of conscience, as mentioned above; and, then, special means, such as: solitude for thinking about one’s sins, prayer, fasting, reading the Holy Scriptures and spiritual books.
Confession must be complete, accurate, without self-justification. We must first remember the most annoying sins (passions, vices), and we must fight them first, as well as sins against love (condemnation, anger, enmity). If such sins exist, they must be the subject of constant repentance and struggle, since God is love. For the same reason, before confession, one must make peace with everyone, forgiving and asking for forgiveness. The Lord said: “If you do not forgive people their trespasses, then your Father will not forgive you your trespasses” (Matthew 6:15).
The priest keeps everything that is said in confession as an absolute secret. As a spiritual remedy, the priest can impose penance on the penitent, for example, assign him special spiritual exercises, or temporarily prevent him from receiving Holy Communion.
(Compiled from the book of Bishop Alexander (Semyonov-Tien-Shansky) Orthodox Catechism).
Confession example
We provide an approximate sample of confession, which can be used as a guide in order to better understand yourself while preparing for the sacrament of Repentance. However, this sample is just a guideline that helps to build a personal confession in which those sins that took place in your life will be named.
“I bring to You, merciful Lord, the heavy burden of my countless sins that I have sinned before You, from my early youth to this day.
I have sinned before You, Lord, by ingratitude to You for Your mercies, by forgetting Your commandments and by indifference to You. I sinned by lack of faith, doubt in matters of faith and freethinking. I sinned through superstition, indifference to the truth and interest in non-Orthodox faiths. I sinned with blasphemous and nasty thoughts, suspicion and suspiciousness. I sinned by attachment to money and luxury items, passions, jealousy and envy. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord.
I sinned by enjoying sinful thoughts, thirsting for pleasure, and spiritual relaxation. I sinned with daydreaming, vanity and false shame. I sinned with pride, contempt for people and arrogance. I sinned with despondency, worldly sadness, despair and murmuring. I sinned with irritability, rancor and gloating. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord.
I sinned with idle talk, unnecessary laughter and ridicule. I sinned by talking in church, by using the name of God in vain, and by judging my neighbors. I sinned with harshness in words, grumpiness, and sarcastic remarks. He sinned by being picky, insulting his neighbors and exaggerating his abilities. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord.
I sinned with indecent jokes, stories and sinful conversations. I sinned by murmuring, breaking my promises and lying. I sinned by using swear words, insulting my neighbors and cursing. I sinned by spreading defamatory rumors, slander and denunciations. I sinned by laziness, wasting time and not attending divine services. I sinned by frequent lateness to services, careless and absent-minded prayer and lack of spiritual fervor. He sinned by neglecting the needs of his family, neglecting the upbringing of his children and failure to fulfill his duties. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord.
He sinned through gluttony, overeating and breaking fasts. I sinned by smoking, drinking alcohol and using stimulants. I sinned by being excessively concerned about my appearance, looking with lust and lust, looking at obscene paintings and photographs. I sinned by listening to violent music, listening to sinful conversations and indecent stories. He sinned through seductive behavior, masturbation, fornication and adultery. Sinned by approving or participating in abortion. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord.
I sinned with love of money and passion for gambling. I sinned with passion for my career and success, self-interest and extravagance. I sinned by refusing to help those in need, by greed and stinginess. I sinned through cruelty, callousness, dryness and lack of love. He sinned by deception, theft and bribery. He sinned by visiting fortune-tellers, invoking evil spirits and performing superstitious customs. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord.
He sinned with outbursts of anger, malice and rude treatment of his neighbors. He sinned through intransigence, revenge, arrogance and insolence. I sinned through disobedience, stubbornness, and hypocrisy. I sinned by careless handling of sacred objects, sacrilege, blasphemy. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord.
I also sinned in words, in thoughts, in actions and with all my feelings, sometimes involuntarily, but most often deliberately due to my stubbornness and sinful custom. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord. I remember some sins, but most of them, due to my negligence and spiritual inattention, I have completely forgotten.
I sincerely repent of all my conscious and unknown sins, and have the determination to do everything possible not to repeat them. Forgive and have mercy on me, Lord."
For those who wish to deeply and thoroughly prepare for the sacrament of confession, we recommend reading the book by Archimandrite John Krestyankin "The experience of constructing a confession" .
How to write a note with sins and what to say to the priest? Confession is the most important religious Sacrament, which is present not only in Orthodoxy and Christianity, but also in other religions, such as Islam and Judaism. It is a key point in the spiritual life of a believer in these spiritual traditions.
A story in the presence of a witness - a clergyman - about sins committed before God cleanses from them, God, through the priest, forgives sins, and atonement for sins occurs. After repentance, the burden is removed from the soul, life becomes easier. Usually confession takes place before, but it is possible separately.
Sacrament of Repentance (Confession) The Orthodox Catechism gives the following definition of this Sacrament: Repentance there is a Sacrament in which one who confesses his sins, with a visible expression of forgiveness from the priest, is invisibly absolved from sins by Jesus Christ Himself.
This Sacrament is called the second Baptism. In the modern Church, as a rule, it precedes the Sacrament of Communion of the Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ, since it prepares the souls of the repentant to participate in this Great Table. Need for Sacrament of Penance is connected with the fact that a person who has become a Christian in the Sacrament of Baptism, which washed away all his sins, continues to sin due to the weakness of human nature.
These sins separate man from God and put a serious barrier between them. Can a person overcome this painful gap on his own? No. If it weren't for Repentance, a person would not be able to be saved, would not be able to preserve the unity with Christ acquired in the Sacrament of Baptism. Repentance- this is spiritual work, the effort of a sinned person aimed at restoring a connection with God in order to be a partaker of His Kingdom.
Repentance implies such spiritual activity of a Christian, as a result of which the sin committed becomes hateful to him. A person’s repentant effort is accepted by the Lord as the greatest sacrifice, the most significant of his daily activities.
Preparing for confession note
Preparing for confession note
In Holy Scripture Repentance is a necessary condition for salvation: “Unless you repent, you will all perish in the same way” (Luke 13:3). And it is joyfully accepted by the Lord and pleasing to Him: “So there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who do not need to repent” (Luke 15: 7).
In the continuous struggle against sin, which continues throughout a person’s earthly life, there are defeats and sometimes serious falls. But after them, a Christian must get up again and again, repent and, without giving in to despondency, continue on his way, because God’s mercy is endless.
The fruit of repentance is reconciliation with God and people and spiritual joy from the revealed participation in the life of God. Forgiveness of sins is given to a person through prayer and the sacrament of a priest, who is given the grace by God in the Sacrament of the Priesthood to forgive sins on earth.
The repentant sinner receives justification and sanctification in the Sacrament, and the confessed sin is completely erased from a person’s life and ceases to destroy his soul. The visible side Sacraments of Penance consists in the confession of sins brought to God by the repentant in the presence of a priest, and in the resolution of sins performed by God through the clergy.
It happens like this:
1. The priest reads preliminary prayers from the service Sacraments of Penance, prompting confessors to sincere repentance.
2. The penitent, standing in front of the cross and the Gospel, lying on a lectern, as if before the Lord Himself, verbally confesses all his sins, without hiding anything and without making excuses.
3. The priest, having accepted this confession, covers the penitent’s head with an epitrachelion and reads a prayer of absolution, through which in the name of Jesus Christ he absolves the penitent from all the sins of which he confessed.
The invisible effect of God's grace consists in the fact that the repentant, with visible evidence of forgiveness from the priest, is invisibly absolved from sins by Jesus Christ Himself. As a result of this, the confessor is reconciled with God, the Church and his own conscience and is freed from punishment for confessed sins in eternity.
confession and communion for the first time
Establishment of the Sacrament of Penance
Confession as the most important part Sacraments of Penance, has been performed since the time of the apostles: “Many of those who believed came, confessing and revealing their deeds (Acts 19; 18)”. The ritual forms of the celebration of the Sacrament in the apostolic age were not developed in detail, but the main components of the liturgical and liturgical structure inherent in modern rites already existed.
They were next.
1. Oral confession of sins to a priest.
2. The pastor’s teaching on repentance is in accordance with the internal structure of the recipient of the Sacrament.
3. Intercessory prayers of the shepherd and repentant prayers of the penitent.
4. Resolution from sins. If the sins confessed by the penitent were grave, then serious church punishments could be imposed - temporary deprivation of the right to participate in the Sacrament of the Eucharist; prohibition from attending community meetings. For mortal sins - murder or adultery - those who did not repent of them were publicly expelled from the community.
Sinners subjected to such severe punishment could change their situation only on condition of sincere repentance. In the ancient Church there were four classes of penitents, differing in the degree of severity of the penances imposed on them:
1. Crying. They had no right to enter the temple and had to remain at the porch in any weather, with tears asking for prayers from those going to the service.
2. Listeners. They had the right to stand in the vestibule and were blessed by the bishop along with those preparing for Baptism. Those who listen to the words “The Announcement, come forth!” are with them! were removed from the temple.
3. Appearing. They had the right to stand at the back of the temple and participate with the faithful in prayers for the penitents. At the end of these prayers, they received the bishop's blessing and left the temple.
4. Worth purchasing. They had the right to stand with the faithful until the end of the Liturgy, but could not partake of the Holy Mysteries. Repentance in the early Christian Church could be performed both publicly and secretly. Public Confession was a kind of exception to the rule, since it was appointed only in cases where a member of the Christian community committed grave sins, which in themselves were quite rare.
Sins spoken in confession
sins spoken in confession
Confession of grave carnal sins was made publicly if it was known for certain that the person had committed them. This happened only when the secret Confession and the assigned penance did not lead to the correction of the penitent
The attitude towards such mortal sins as idolatry, murder and adultery in the ancient Church was very strict. The guilty were excommunicated from church communion for many years, and sometimes for life, and only near death could be the reason that penance was lifted and Communion was taught to the sinner.
Public Repentance practiced in the Church until the end of the 4th century. Its abolition is associated with the name of the Patriarch of Constantinople Nektarios († 398), who abolished the position of presbyter-spiritual priest in charge of public affairs. Repentance.
Following this, the degrees gradually disappeared Repentance, and by the end of the 9th century public Confession finally left the life of the Church. This happened due to the impoverishment of piety. Such a powerful tool as public Repentance, it was appropriate when strict morals and zeal for God were universal and even “natural.” But later, many sinners began to avoid public Repentance because of the shame associated with it.
Another reason for the disappearance of this form of the Sacrament was that sins revealed publicly could serve as a temptation for Christians who were not sufficiently established in the faith. Thus, secret Confession, also known since the first centuries of Christianity, became the only form Repentance. Basically, the changes described above occurred already in the 5th century.
Currently, with a large gathering of confessors in some churches, the so-called “general” Confession. This innovation, which became possible due to the lack of churches and for other, less significant reasons, is unlawful from the point of view of liturgical theology and church piety. It should be remembered that the general Confession- is by no means a norm, but an assumption due to circumstances.
Therefore, even if, with a large crowd of penitents, the priest conducts a general Confession, he must, before reading the prayer of permission, give each confessor the opportunity to express the sins that most burden his soul and conscience. Depriving the parishioner of even such a brief personal Confessions under the pretext of lack of time, the priest violates his pastoral duty and humiliates the dignity of this great Sacrament.
Example of what to say in confession to a priest
Preparation for Confession
Preparation for Confession is not so much about remembering your sins as fully as possible, but rather about achieving a state of concentration and prayer in which the sins will become obvious to the confessor. The penitent, figuratively speaking, must bring Confession not a list of sins, but a repentant feeling and a contrite heart.
Before Confession you need to ask forgiveness from everyone to whom you consider yourself guilty. Start preparing for Confessions(fasting) must be done a week or at least three days before the Sacrament itself. This preparation should consist of a certain abstinence in words, thoughts and actions, in food and entertainment, and in general in the renunciation of everything that interferes with inner concentration.
The most important component of such preparation should be concentrated, in-depth prayer, promoting awareness of one’s sins and aversion to them. In rank Repentance to remind those who came to Confessions their sins, the priest reads a list of the most significant sins and passionate movements inherent in man.
The confessor must listen to him carefully and once again note to himself what his conscience accuses him of. Approaching the priest after this “general” Confession, the penitent must confess the sins that he has committed.
Sins previously confessed and absolved by the priest are repeated on Confessions should not be because after Repentance they become “as if they were not.”
But if since the previous Confessions they were repeated, then it is necessary to repent again. It is also necessary to confess those sins that were forgotten earlier, if they are suddenly remembered now. When repenting, one should not name accomplices or those who voluntarily or unwittingly provoked the sin. In any case, a person himself is responsible for his iniquities, committed by him out of weakness or negligence.
Sins in Orthodoxy confession
Sins in Orthodoxy confession
Attempts to shift the blame onto others only lead to the confessor aggravating his sin by self-justification and condemnation of his neighbor. Under no circumstances should one indulge in long stories about the circumstances that led to the confessor being “forced” to commit a sin.
We must learn to confess in such a way that Repentance do not replace your sins with everyday conversations, in which the main place is occupied by praising yourself and your noble deeds, condemning loved ones and complaining about the difficulties of life. Self-justification is associated with downplaying sins, especially with reference to their ubiquity, as if “everyone lives like this.” But it is obvious that the mass nature of sin does not in any way justify the sinner.
Some confessors, in order not to forget the sins they have committed due to excitement or lack of collection, come to Confession with a written list of them. This custom is good if the confessor sincerely repents of his sins, and does not formally list the iniquities recorded but not mourned. A note with sins immediately after Confessions needs to be destroyed.
Under no circumstances should you try to do Confession comfortable and go through it without straining your spiritual powers, saying general phrases such as “sinful in everything” or obscuring the ugliness of sin with general expressions, for example, “sinned against the 7th commandment.” You cannot be distracted by trifles and remain silent about what really weighs on your conscience.
Provoking such behavior Confessions False shame in front of a confessor is destructive for spiritual life. Having become accustomed to lying before God Himself, you can lose hope of salvation. A cowardly fear of seriously beginning to understand the “quagmire” of one’s life can sever any connection with Christ.
This arrangement of the confessor also becomes the reason for him to downplay his sins, which is by no means harmless, since it leads to a distorted view of himself and his relationship with God and his neighbors. We must carefully reconsider our entire life and free it from sins that have become habitual.
How to properly prepare for confession
Scripture directly names the consequences of covering up sins and self-justification: “Do not be deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor wicked people, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God (1 Cor. 6; 9, 10).”
One should not think that killing an unborn fetus (abortion) is also a “minor sin.” According to the rules of the ancient Church, those who did this were punished in the same way as the murderers of a person. You cannot hide out of false shame or shyness Confessions some shameful sins, otherwise this concealment will make the remission of other sins incomplete.
Consequently, the Communion of the Body and Blood of Christ after such Confessions will be in “trial and condemnation.” The very common division of sins into “heavy” and “light” is very arbitrary. Such habitual “light” sins as everyday lies, dirty, blasphemous and lustful thoughts, anger, verbosity, constant jokes, rudeness and inattention to people, if repeated many times, paralyze the soul.
It is easier to renounce a grave sin and sincerely repent of it than to realize the harmfulness of “minor” sins that lead to the enslavement of a person. A well-known patristic parable demonstrates that removing a pile of small stones is much more difficult than moving a large stone of equal weight. When confessing, you should not expect “leading” questions from the priest; you must remember that the initiative is in Confessions must belong to the penitent.
It is he who must make a spiritual effort on himself, freeing himself in the Sacrament from all his iniquities. Recommended when preparing for Confessions, remember what other people, acquaintances and even strangers, and especially close and family members usually accuse the confessor of, since very often their claims are fair.
If it seems that this is not so, then here too it is simply necessary to accept their attacks without bitterness. After a person’s churching reaches a certain “point,” he has problems of a different order associated with Confession.
That habit of the Sacrament, which arises as a result of repeated appeal to it, gives rise, for example, to formalization Confessions when they confess because “it’s necessary.” While dryly listing true and imaginary sins, such a confessor does not have the main thing - a repentant attitude.
Confession and Communion rules
Confession and Communion rules
This happens if there seems to be nothing to confess (that is, a person simply does not see his sins), but it is necessary (after all, “it is necessary to take communion”, “holiday”, “haven’t confessed for a long time”, etc.). This attitude reveals a person’s inattention to the inner life of the soul, lack of understanding of his sins (even if only mental ones) and passionate movements. Formalization Confessions leads to the fact that a person resorts to the Sacrament “in court and in condemnation.”
A very common problem is substitution Confessions their real, serious sins, imaginary or unimportant sins. A person often does not understand that his formal fulfillment of “the duties of a Christian (reading the rule, not fasting on a fast day, going to church) are not a goal, but a means to achieving what Christ himself defined in the words: “By this everyone will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35).
Therefore, if a Christian does not eat animal products during fasting, but “bites and devours” his relatives, then this is a serious reason to doubt his correct understanding of the essence of Orthodoxy. Getting used to Confessions, as with any shrine, leads to dire consequences. A person ceases to be afraid of offending God with his sin, because “there is always Confession and you can repent.”
Such manipulations with the Sacrament always end very badly. God does not punish a person for such a mood of the soul, he simply turns away from him for the time being, since no one (not even the Lord) experiences joy from communicating with a double-minded person who is not honest either with God or with his conscience.
A person who has become a Christian needs to understand that the struggle with his sins will continue throughout his life. Therefore, one must humbly, turning for help to the One who can ease this struggle and make him a winner, and persistently continue this grace-filled path.
Conditions under which a confessor receives absolution Repentance- this is not just a verbal confession of sins to a priest. This is the spiritual work of the penitent, aimed at receiving Divine forgiveness, destroying sin and its consequences.
List of sins for confession for women and men
This is possible provided that the confessor
1) laments his sins;
2) is determined to improve his life;
3) has undoubted hope in the mercy of Christ. Contrition for sins.
At a certain moment of his spiritual development a person begins to feel the severity of sin, its unnaturalness and harmfulness to the soul. The reaction to this is grief of the heart and contrition for one’s sins. But this contrition of the penitent should stem not so much from fear of punishment for sins, but from love for God, whom he offended with his ingratitude.
The intention to improve your life. A firm determination to correct one's life is a necessary condition for receiving the forgiveness of sins. Repentance only in words, without an inner desire to correct one’s life, leads to even greater condemnation.
Saint Basil the Great discusses this as follows: “It is not he who confesses his sin who said: I have sinned, and then remains in sin; but the one who, in the words of the psalm, “found his sin and hated it.” What benefit will a doctor's care bring to a sick person when the person suffering from illness clings tightly to something that is destructive to life?
So there is no benefit from forgiving someone who commits injustice, and from apologizing for debauchery to someone who continues to live dissolutely.”.
Faith in Christ and hope in His mercy
An example of undoubted faith and hope for God's endless mercy is the forgiveness of Peter after his three-fold denial of Christ. From the Sacred History of the New Testament it is known, for example, that for sincere faith and hope the Lord had mercy on Mary, the sister of Lazarus, who washed the Savior’s feet with tears, anointed them with myrrh and wiped them with her hair (See: Luke 7; 36-50).
What sins to talk about in confession
The publican Zacchaeus was also pardoned, having distributed half of his property to the poor and returning to those whom he had offended four times more than what had been taken away (See: Luke 19; 1-10). The greatest saint of the Orthodox Church, the Venerable Mary of Egypt, having been a harlot for many years, through deep repentance changed her life so much that she could walk on water, saw the past and future as the present, and was awarded communion with angels in the desert.
Perfect sign Repentance is expressed in a feeling of lightness, purity and inexplicable joy, when the confessed sin seems simply impossible.
Penance
Penance (Greek epithymion - punishment under the law) - voluntary performance by the penitent - as a moral and corrective measure - of certain works of piety (prolonged prayer, alms, intensive fasting, pilgrimage, etc.).
Penance is prescribed by the confessor and does not have the meaning of punishment or punitive measure, without implying the deprivation of any rights of a member of the Church. Being only “spiritual medicine”, it is prescribed for the purpose of eradicating the habits of sin. This is a lesson, an exercise that accustoms one to spiritual achievement and gives rise to a desire for it.
Feats of prayer and good deeds, assigned as penance, must be in essence directly opposite to the sin for which they are assigned: for example, works of mercy are assigned to someone who is subject to the passion of love of money; an intemperate person is assigned a fast beyond what is prescribed for everyone; absent-minded and carried away by worldly pleasures - more frequent going to temple, reading the Holy Scriptures, increased home prayer etc.
Preparing for confession list of sins
Possible types of penance:
1) bows during worship or reading a home prayer rule;
2) Jesus Prayer;
3) getting up for the midnight office;
4) spiritual reading(Akathists, Lives of Saints, etc.);
5) strict fasting; 6) abstinence from marital intercourse;
7) alms, etc.
Penance must be treated as the will of God expressed through the priest, accepting it for mandatory fulfillment. Penance should be limited to a precise time frame (usually 40 days) and, if possible, performed according to a strict schedule.
If the penitent, for one reason or another, cannot fulfill the penance, then he must seek a blessing on what to do in this case from the priest who imposed it. If the sin was committed against a neighbor, then a necessary condition that must be met before performing penance is reconciliation with the one whom the penitent offended.
A special prayer of permission, called the prayer of permission from prohibition, must be read over the person who has fulfilled the penance given to him, by the priest who imposed it.
How to prepare for communion and confession
Children's Confession
According to the rules of the Orthodox Church, children should begin to confess at the age of seven, since by this time they are already able to answer before God for their actions and fight their sins. Depending on the degree of development of the child, he can be brought to Confessions both a little earlier and a little later than the specified period, after consulting with the priest on this topic.
The rite of Confession for children and adolescents is no different from the usual, but the priest, naturally, takes into account the age of those coming to the Sacrament and makes certain adjustments when communicating with such confessors. Communion of children and adolescents, like adults, should be done on an empty stomach.
But if, for health reasons, the child needs to eat in the morning, Communion, with the blessing of the priest, can be given to him. Parents should just not deliberately and unreasonably violate the rule about Communion on an empty stomach, since such actions can offend the holiness of this great Sacrament and it will be “in court and condemnation” (primarily for parents who condone lawlessness).
Teenagers are not allowed to come to Confessions very late. Such a violation is unacceptable and can lead to a refusal to give communion to a latecomer if this sin is repeated several times.
Confession children and adolescents should produce the same results as with Repentance adult: the repentant must no longer commit confessed sins, or at least try with all his might not to do so. In addition, the child should try to do good deeds, voluntarily helping parents and loved ones, caring for younger brothers and sisters.
Orthodoxy confession and communion
Parents must form a conscious attitude of the child towards Confessions, excluding, if possible, a chastising, consumerist attitude towards her and towards her Heavenly Father. The principle expressed by the simple formula: “You to me, I to you” is categorically unacceptable for a child’s relationship with God. A child should not be encouraged to “please” God in order to receive some benefits from Him.
We must awaken in a child’s soul its best feelings: sincere love for the One who is worthy of such love; devotion to Him; natural aversion to all uncleanness. Children are characterized by vicious tendencies that need to be eradicated.
These include such sins as mockery and ridicule (especially in the company of peers) of the weak and crippled; petty lies into which an ingrained habit of empty fantasies can develop; cruelty to animals; appropriation of other people's things, antics, laziness, rudeness and foul language. All this should be the subject of close attention of parents who are called to the daily painstaking work of raising a little Christian.
ConfessionAnd Communion seriously ill patient at home
At that moment when the life of an Orthodox Christian is approaching sunset and he lies on his deathbed, it is very important that his relatives, despite the difficult circumstances that often accompany this, are able to invite a priest to him to guide him into Eternal Life.
If the dying man can bring the last Repentance and the Lord will give him the opportunity to receive communion, then this mercy of God will greatly influence his posthumous fate. Relatives need to keep this in mind not only when the patient is a church person, but also if the dying person has been a person of little faith all his life.
The last illness greatly changes a person, and the Lord can touch his heart already on his deathbed. Sometimes in this way Christ calls even criminals and blasphemers! Therefore, at the slightest opportunity for this, relatives need to help the sick person take this step towards the calling Christ and repent of his sins.
Usually the priest is called to the house in advance, turning to the “candle box”, where they must write down the coordinates of the patient, immediately setting, if possible, the time for the future visit. The patient must be psychologically prepared for the priest’s arrival, set up to prepare for Confessions, as far as his physical condition allows.
Complete list of sins for confession
When the priest comes, the patient needs, if he has the strength to do so, to ask him for a blessing. The patient’s relatives can be at his bedside and take part in prayers until the start of the Confessions when they naturally have to leave.
But after reading the prayer of permission, they can re-enter and pray for the communicant. Chin Confessions patients at home differs from the usual and is placed in the 14th chapter of the Breviary entitled “The Rite, when it soon happens that the sick person will be given communion.”
If the patient knows the prayers for Communion by heart and is able to repeat them, then let him do this after the priest, who reads them in separate phrases. To receive the Holy Mysteries, the patient must be placed on the bed so that he does not choke, preferably reclining. After Participles the patient, if possible, reads prayers of gratitude himself. Then the priest pronounces the dismissal and gives the Cross to be kissed by the communicant and all those present.
If the patient’s relatives have a desire and if the condition of the communicant allows it, then they can invite the priest to the table and once again clarify in a conversation with him how to behave at the bedside of a seriously ill person, what is preferable to discuss with him, how to support him in this situation.
Passion as the root and cause of sin
Passion is defined as a strong, persistent, all-encompassing emotion that dominates a person’s other impulses and leads to concentration on the object of passion. Thanks to these properties, passion becomes the source and cause of sin in the human soul.
Orthodox asceticism has accumulated centuries of experience in observing and combating passions, which has made it possible to reduce them into clear patterns. The primary source of these classifications is the scheme of St. John Cassian the Roman, followed by Evagrius, Nilus of Sinai, Ephraim the Syrian, John Climacus, Maximus the Confessor and Gregory Palamas.
According to the above-mentioned ascetic teachers, there are eight sinful passions inherent in the human soul:
1. Pride.
2. Vanity.
3. Gluttony.
4. Fornication.
5. Love of money.
6. Anger.
7. Sadness.
8. Dejection.
Stages of gradual formation of passion:
1. Prediction or attack (glory: hit - collide with something) - sinful impressions or ideas that arise in the mind against the will of a person. Addictions are not considered a sin and are not charged against a person if the person does not respond to them with sympathy.
2. A thought becomes a thought that first meets interest in a person’s soul, and then compassion for oneself. This is the first stage of passion development. A thought is born in a person when his attention becomes favorable to the pretext. At this stage, the thought evokes a feeling of anticipation of future pleasure. The Holy Fathers call this a combination or conversation with a thought.
what sins to list in confession
3. Inclination towards a thought (intention) occurs when a thought completely takes possession of a person’s consciousness and his attention is focused only on it. If a person, through an effort of will, cannot free himself from a sinful thought, replacing it with something good and pleasing to God, then the next stage begins when the will itself is carried away by the sinful thought and strives for its implementation.
This means that the sin in intention has already been committed and all that remains is to practically satisfy the sinful desire.
4. The fourth stage of the development of passion is called captivity, when passionate attraction begins to dominate the will, constantly dragging the soul towards the realization of sin. A mature and deep-rooted passion is an idol, which a person subject to it, often without knowing it, serves and worships.
The path to liberation from the tyranny of passion is sincere repentance and determination to correct your life. A sign of passions formed in a person’s soul is the repetition of the same sins at almost every Confession. If this happens, it means that in the soul of a person who has become close to his passion, a process of imitation of the struggle with it is taking place. Abba Dorotheos distinguishes three states in a person in relation to his struggle with passion:
1. When he acts according to passion (bringing it to fulfillment).
2. When a person resists it (not acting out of passion, but not cutting it off, having it in himself).
3. When he eradicates it (by struggling and doing the opposite of passion). Freeing himself from passions, a person must acquire virtues that are opposite to them, otherwise the passions that had left the person will definitely return.
Sins
Sin is a violation of the Christian moral law - its content is reflected in the Epistle of the Apostle John: “Whoever commits sin also commits iniquity”(1 John 3; 4).
The most serious sins, which, if unrepentant, lead to the death of a person, are called mortal. There are seven of them:
1. Pride.
2. Gluttony.
3. Fornication.
4. Anger.
5. Love of money.
6. Sadness.
7. Dejection.
Sin is the realization of passion in thoughts, words and deeds. Therefore, it must be considered in a dialectical connection with the passion that has formed or is being formed in the human soul. Everything said in the chapter devoted to passions is directly related to human sins, as if revealing the fact of the presence of passion in the soul of a sinning person. Sins are divided into three categories, depending on whom they are committed against.
How confession happens video
How confession happens on video
1. Sins against God.
2. Sins against one's neighbor.
3. Sins against oneself.
Below is an approximate, far from complete list of these sins. It should be noted that very widespread in Lately tendency to see a goal Repentance in the most detailed verbal enumeration of sins, it contradicts the spirit of the Sacrament and profanes it.
Therefore, it is not worth engaging in scolding, expressed in the weekly “confession” of countless sins and transgressions. “A sacrifice to God is a broken spirit; You will not despise a broken and humble heart, O God” (Ps. 50:19)- says the inspired prophet David about the meaning of Repentance.
Paying attention to the movements of your soul and noting your wrongdoing before the Lord in specific circumstances of life, you must always remember that to acquire in the Sacrament of Repentance you need a “contrite heart”, and not a “much-verbal” tongue.
Sins against God
Pride: breaking God's commandments; unbelief, lack of faith and superstition; lack of hope in God's mercy; excessive reliance on God's mercy; hypocritical veneration of God, formal worship of him; blasphemy; lack of love and fear of God; ingratitude to God for all His blessings, as well as for sorrows and illnesses; blasphemy and murmuring against the Lord; failure to fulfill promises made to Him; calling on the Name of God in vain (unnecessarily); pronouncing oaths invoking His name; falling into delusion.
Disrespect for icons, relics, saints, Holy Scripture and any other shrine; reading heretical books, keeping them in the house; irreverent attitude towards the Cross, the sign of the cross, the pectoral cross; fear of professing the Orthodox faith; failure to comply with prayer rules: morning and evening prayers; omission of reading the Psalter, Holy Scripture, and other Divine books; absences without good reason from Sunday and holiday services; neglect of church services; prayer without zeal and diligence, absent-minded and formal.
Conversations, laughter, walking around the temple during church services; inattention to reading and singing; being late for services and leaving church early; going to the temple and touching its shrines in physical uncleanness.
What to say before confession video
Lack of zeal in repentance, rare Confession and deliberate concealment of sins; Communion without heartfelt contrition and without proper preparation, without reconciliation with neighbors, at enmity with them. Disobedience to one's spiritual father; condemnation of clergy and monastics; grumbling and resentment towards them; disrespect for the feasts of God; bustle on big days church holidays; violation of fasts and constant fast days- Wednesdays and Fridays - throughout the year.
Watching heretical TV shows; listening to non-Orthodox preachers, heretics and sectarians; passion for Eastern religions and creeds; turning to psychics, astrologers, fortune tellers, fortune tellers, “grandmothers”, sorcerers; practicing “black and white” magic, witchcraft, fortune telling, spiritualism; superstitions: belief in dreams and omens; wearing “amulets” and talismans. Suicidal thoughts and attempts to commit suicide.
Sins against one's neighbor
Lack of love for your neighbors and your enemies; unforgiveness of their sins; hatred and malice; responding evil to evil; disrespect towards parents; disrespect for elders and superiors; killing babies in the womb (abortion), advising your friends to have abortions; attempt on someone else's life and health; causing bodily harm; robbery; extortion; appropriation of someone else's property (including non-repayment of debts).
Refusal to help the weak, oppressed, and in trouble; laziness towards work and household responsibilities; disrespect for other people's work; unmercifulness; stinginess; inattention to the sick and to those in difficult life circumstances; omission of prayers for neighbors and enemies; cruelty to animals and flora, consumer attitude towards them; contradiction and intransigence to neighbors; disputes; a deliberate lie for the “eloquent word”; condemnation; slander, gossip and gossip; disclosure of other people's sins; eavesdropping on other people's conversations.
What to do before confession and communion
Infliction of insults and insults; enmity with neighbors and scandals; cursing others, including one’s own children; insolence and arrogance in relations with neighbors; bad upbringing of children, lack of effort to plant the saving truths of the Christian faith in their hearts; hypocrisy, using others for personal gain; anger; suspicion of neighbors of unseemly actions; deception and perjury.
Seductive behavior at home and in public; the desire to seduce and please others; jealousy and envy; foul language, retelling of indecent stories, obscene jokes; intentional and unintentional (as an example to follow) corruption of others by one’s actions; the desire to gain self-interest from friendship or other close relationships; treason; magical actions with the aim of harming a neighbor and his family.
Sins against yourself
Dejection and despair arising from the development of vanity and pride; arrogance, pride, self-confidence, arrogance; doing good deeds for show; thoughts of suicide; carnal excesses: gluttony, sweet eating, gluttony; abuse of bodily peace and comfort: excessive sleeping, laziness, lethargy, relaxation; addiction to a certain way of life, reluctance to change it for the sake of helping one’s neighbor.
Drunkenness, drawing non-drinkers, including minors and the sick, into this vicious passion; smoking, drug addiction, as a type of suicide; playing cards and other games of chance; lies, envy; love for the earthly and material more than for the heavenly and spiritual.
Idleness, wastefulness, attachment to things; wasting your time; using God-given talents not for good; addiction to comfort, acquisitiveness: saving for a rainy day food products, clothes, shoes, furniture, jewelry, etc.; passion for luxury; over-concern, vanity.
Desire for earthly honors and glory; “decorating” oneself with cosmetics, tattoos, piercings, etc. for the purpose of seducing. Sensual, lustful thoughts; commitment to seductive sights and conversations; incontinence of mental and physical feelings, pleasure and procrastination in unclean thoughts.
Sacrament of Confession and Communion video
Voluptuousness; immodest views of people of the opposite sex; recollection with delight of one’s former carnal sins; addiction to prolonged viewing of television programs; watching pornographic films, reading pornographic books and magazines; pimping and prostitution; singing obscene songs.
Indecent dancing; defilement in a dream; fornication (outside of marriage) and adultery (adultery); free behavior with persons of the opposite sex; masturbation; immodest view of wives and young men; incontinence in married life (during fasting, on Saturdays and Sundays, church holidays).
Confession
Coming to Confessions, must know that the priest receiving it is not a simple interlocutor for the confessor, but is a witness to the mysterious conversation of the penitent with God.
The Sacrament occurs as follows: the penitent, approaching the lectern, bows to the ground before the cross and the Gospel lying on the lectern. If there are many confessors, this bow is done in advance. During the interview, the priest and confessor stand at the lectern; or the priest is sitting, and the penitent is kneeling.
Those waiting their turn should not come close to the place where Confession is being performed, so that the sins being confessed are not heard by them, and the secret is not broken. For the same purposes, the interview should be conducted in a low voice.
If the confessor is a novice, then Confession can be structured as reflected in the Breviary: the confessor asks the penitent questions according to the list.
Confession with video explanations
Confession with video explanations
In practice, however, the enumeration of sins is done in the first, general part. Confessions. The priest then pronounces the “Testament,” in which he urges the confessor not to repeat the sins he has confessed. However, the text of the “Testament” in the form in which it is printed in the Trebnik is rarely read; for the most part, the priest simply gives his instructions to the confessor.
After Confession finished, the priest reads the prayer “Lord God, the salvation of Thy servants...”, which precedes the secret prayer Sacraments of Penance.
After this, the confessor kneels, and the priest, covering his head with the stole, reads a prayer of permission, containing the secret formula: “Our Lord and God Jesus Christ, by the grace and generosity of His love for mankind, forgive you, child (name), all your sins, and I, an unworthy priest, by His power given to me, forgive and absolve you from all your sins, in the Name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen".
Then the priest makes the sign of the cross over the head of the confessor. After this, the confessor rises from his knees and kisses the Holy Cross and the Gospel.
If the confessor considers it impossible to forgive confessed sins due to their severity or other reasons, then the prayer of absolution is not read and the confessor is not allowed to receive Communion. In this case, penance may be assigned for a certain period. Then the final prayers are read “Worthy to eat...”, "Glory, and now..." and the priest administers the dismissal.
Ends Confession instructions from the confessor to the penitent and assigning him to read the canon against his sins, if the priest finds this necessary.
The material uses chapters from the book (abbreviated) “Handbook of an Orthodox Person. Sacraments of the Orthodox Church" (Danilovsky Evangelist, Moscow, 2007
We hope you liked the article about confession and communion: how to write a note with sins and what to say to the priest and a video on this topic. Stay with us on the portal of communication and self-improvement and read other useful and interesting materials on this topic!
IN modern world The Gospel call to always be awake and constantly pray is very difficult to put into practice. Constant worries and a very high pace of life, especially in large cities, practically deprive Christians of the opportunity to retire and come before God in prayer. But the concept of prayer is still extremely relevant, and turning to it is certainly necessary. Regular prayer always leads to the thought of repentance, which occurs at confession. Prayer is an example of how you can accurately and objectively evaluate your state of mind.
Sin concept
Sin should not be viewed as some kind of legal violation of God-given law. This is not a “going beyond the boundaries” accepted in the mind, but a violation of the laws natural to human nature. Each person is endowed by God with absolute freedom; accordingly, any falls are committed consciously. In essence, by committing sin, a person neglects the commandments and values given from above. There is a free choice in favor of negative actions, thoughts and other actions. Such a spiritual crime harms the personality itself, damaging the very vulnerable inner strings of human nature. Sin is based on passions, inherited or acquired, as well as original susceptibility, which made a person mortal and weaker to various diseases and vices.
This greatly contributes to the soul deviating towards evil and immorality. Sin can be different, its severity, of course, depends on many factors in which it is committed. There is a conditional division of sins: against God, against one’s neighbor and against oneself. By considering your own actions through such a gradation, you can understand how to write a confession. An example will be discussed below.
Awareness of sin and confession
It is extremely important to understand that in order to eliminate dark spiritual spots, you should constantly turn your inner gaze to yourself, analyze your actions, thoughts and words, and objectively evaluate the moral scale of your own values. Having found disturbing and haunting traits, you need to carefully deal with them, because if you close your eyes to sin, very soon you will become accustomed to it, which will distort the soul and lead to spiritual illness. The main way out of such a situation is repentance and repentance.
It is repentance, growing from the depths of the heart and mind, that can change a person’s personality. better side, bring the light of kindness and mercy. But the path of repentance is a lifelong path. He is prone to sin and will commit it every day. Even great ascetics who secluded themselves in deserted places sinned in their thoughts and could bring repentance daily. Therefore, close attention to one’s soul should not weaken, and with age, the criteria for personal assessment should be subjected to more stringent requirements. The next step after repentance is confession.
An example of correct confession - true repentance
In Orthodoxy, confession is recommended for all people over seven years of age. By the age of seven or eight, a child raised in a Christian family already acquires an understanding of the sacrament. It is often prepared in advance, explaining in detail all aspects of this complex issue. Some parents show an example of a confession written on paper that was invented in advance. A child left alone with such information has the opportunity to reflect and see something in himself. But in the case of children, priests and parents rely, first of all, on the psychological state of the child and his worldview, the ability to analyze and understand the criteria of good and evil. With excessive haste in the forcible involvement of children, one can sometimes observe disastrous results and examples.
Confessions in church often turn into a formal “roll call” of sins, while performing only the “external” part of the sacrament is unacceptable. You cannot try to justify yourself, to hide something that is embarrassing and shameful. You need to listen to yourself and understand whether repentance is really present, or whether there is just an ordinary ritual ahead that will not bring any benefit to the soul, but can cause significant harm.
Confession is a voluntary and repentant listing of sins. This sacrament includes two main parts:
1) Confession of sins to the priest by the person who came to the sacrament.
2) Prayerful forgiveness and resolution of sins, which is pronounced by the shepherd.
Preparing for Confession
A question that torments not only new Christians, but sometimes even those who have been churched for a long time - what to say in confession? An example of how to repent can be found in various sources. This could be a prayer book or a separate book dedicated to this particular sacrament.
When preparing for confession, you can rely on the commandments, ordeals, and take the example of the confession of holy ascetics who left records and sayings on this topic.
If you construct a repentant monologue based on the division of sins into three types given above, then you can determine an incomplete, approximate list of deviations.
Sins against God
This category includes lack of faith, superstition, lack of hope in God's mercy, formality and lack of faith in the dogmas of Christianity, grumbling and ingratitude of God, and oaths. This group includes an irreverent attitude towards objects of veneration - icons, the Gospel, the Cross, and so on. Mention should be made of skipping services for unexcused reasons and abandoning mandatory rules, prayers, and also if prayers were read hastily, without attention and the necessary concentration.
Adherence to various sectarian teachings, thoughts of suicide, turning to sorcerers and sorcerers, wearing mystical talismans is considered apostasy, and such things must be brought to confession. An example of this category of sins is, of course, approximate, and each person can add or shorten this list.
Sins directed against one's neighbor
This group examines attitudes towards people: family, friends, colleagues and just casual acquaintances and strangers. The first thing that most often clearly reveals itself in the heart is the lack of love. Often, instead of love, there is a consumer attitude. Inability and unwillingness to forgive, hatred, gloating, malice and revenge, stinginess, condemnation, gossip, lies, indifference to the misfortune of others, unmercifulness and cruelty - all these ugly thorns in the human soul must be confessed. Separately, actions in which open self-harm occurred or material damage was caused are indicated. This could be fights, extortion, robbery.
The gravest sin is abortion, which certainly entails church punishment after it is brought to confession. An example of what the punishment could be is obtained from the parish priest. Typically, penance will be imposed, but it will be more disciplinary than expiatory.
Sins directed against oneself
This group is reserved for personal sins. Dejection, terrible despair and thoughts of one’s own hopelessness or excessive pride, contempt, vanity - such passions can poison a person’s life and even lead him to suicide.
Thus, listing all the commandments one after another, the pastor calls for a detailed consideration of the state of mind and checking whether it corresponds to the essence of the message.
About brevity
Priests often ask for brief confessions. This does not mean that there is no need to name some sin. We must try to talk specifically about the sin, but not about the circumstances in which it was committed, without involving third parties who may be somehow involved in the situation, and without describing the details in detail. If repentance occurs in church for the first time, you can sketch out an example of confession on paper, then while convicting yourself of sins it will be easier to gather yourself, convey to the priest and, most importantly, to God absolutely everything you noticed, without forgetting anything.
It is recommended to pronounce the name of the sin itself: lack of faith, anger, insult or condemnation. This will be enough to convey what worries and weighs heavily on the heart. “Extracting” the exact sins from oneself is not an easy task, but this is how a short confession is created. An example could be the following: “I sinned: with pride, despondency, foul language, fear of little faith, excessive idleness, bitterness, lies, ambition, abandonment of services and rules, irritability, temptation, bad and unclean thoughts, excess in food, laziness. I also repent of those sins that I forgot and did not say now.”
Confession is, of course, a difficult task that requires effort and self-denial. But when a person gets used to the purity of heart and tidiness of the soul, he will no longer be able to live without repentance and the sacrament of communion. A Christian will not want to lose the newly acquired connection with the Almighty and will only strive to strengthen it. It is very important to approach spiritual life not “in spurts,” but gradually, carefully, regularly, to be “faithful in small things,” not forgetting about gratitude to God in absolutely all life situations.
