A guy's actions if a woman is unavailable. Men fall in love with unavailable women. I didn't always make sure my thong didn't show out of my pants.

Hi girls! Let's talk in this article about how to become an unavailable girl, and whether it is necessary.

You've probably heard that men are attracted to unavailable girls. By “inaccessibility”, each girl understands something different, most often she comes up with a certain set of rules for herself, like: ignore him more often, pretend that she cares about the star of his courtship, flirt with everyone except him, cause jealousy, etc. .d. and so on.

Moreover, some of these rules are too far-fetched and artificial and do not lead to the result that was expected. And the true iceberg of “inaccessibility”, invisible to the eye, so to speak, is not in HOW the girl behaves, but in how she feels about herself . And her behavior is based on her attitude towards herself.

After all, the girls for whose attention and favor men are ready to break into pieces are not necessarily special or god-like, and not those who strictly follow some set of rules regarding inaccessibility.

They are ordinary girls. Just they know their worth and do not show a man pigish delight at the fact that he is showing them signs of attention, and do not put the man’s interests above their own.

Now there will be a very important moment: it is important for a girl to decide who she wants to be: the one for which men climb the wall, or the one who climbs the wall for men. Either this or that.

Why is it bad to be a wish-fulfiller?

If a girl chooses and maintains in herself the desire to please, to fulfill all the desires of a man, to bend somewhere under him, so that he does not leave and if only he feels good, while forgetting about her needs, this is a dead end.

How many girls complain that the guy quickly lost interest in them, became completely different, stopped paying attention and time to them, although they did nothing wrong and tried very hard for the relationship... Moreover, in the vast majority of cases, all these girls belong to the same type - the type who pleases and pleases in everything.

It would seem: what’s wrong? Why is such a companion bad for a man - after all, she is ready to do everything for him?

And like this! Human nature is such that the more they bend over backwards for you, the more often they neglect their desires and aspirations for the sake of yours, the more they demonstrate puppyish devotion, the less respect you have for the person. This is fine. This is how our psychology tries to protect us from unhealthy attachments and unequal connections, which can lead to unstable and inharmonious relationships.

Standard life example

And sometimes it turns out to be a kind of vicious circle. For example, a guy met a girl, he liked her - she was sweet, pretty, she had something to talk about. The guy begins to court her.

But when a relationship begins, a girl (perhaps she is not very confident in herself, perhaps she is uncomfortable being alone) begins to please the guy in everything, being afraid to say a word against him and from the first day anticipating and fulfilling all his whims - in order to keep him, because she is afraid lose him: the guy seems to be good.

But the guy is also a person, capable of assessing and analyzing the behavior of other people. What does he see? That the girl is very afraid of losing him, afraid of being left without him. She is so afraid that she herself is ready to do anything for the sake of a relationship. Which means he has nothing to conquer. And there is nothing to try for. The guy's ardor is slowly beginning to fade.

The girl, noticing that the guy seems to have grown cold, gets very scared, begins to try even harder, bend over and lie down in front of him even more: anything, just so that he doesn’t leave. From which the guy loses the remnants of respect for the girl and leaves. Or uses it.

And then a bunch of girls/women appear who complain: I did everything for him, everything! And he is an ungrateful brute! He may be an ungrateful brute, but he is also a man for whom normal male psychology has worked.

And what's the result? Another man who has lost respect for a girl, and another girl who has lost her dignity. To prevent this from happening, be sure to read.

How will be correct?

How, then, not to screw up with someone you like, and make sure that it is for your sake that they climb the wall, and not vice versa? And this is very easy to learn.

Here you need to understand one thing about inaccessibility. Unavailability is not when you can't be reached by phone, not when you ignore a man, and not when you walk around with your chin up like a queen.

Inaccessibility is a technique attracted - ran away .

“Attracted” - because it’s very strange to try to be inaccessible to someone who is not interested in you) It’s like in the joke:

Two cowboys are sitting outside a saloon, talking:
- Billy, who's that prancing there on a horse?
- Oh, yes, it’s the elusive Joe!
- Why elusive? Can't anyone really catch him?
- Yes, no one who needs him catches him...

So you can only become inaccessible to someone who is interested in you and who is trying to make you available.

“Run away” - because if you grabbed a man’s leg after the first date, laid out the borscht soup, planned your wedding and the names of your future children - this is definitely not about inaccessibility.
“Run away” shows that you have a lot of interesting things to do. Either to dance, or to language courses, or to your favorite job, or to meet with friends... Your time is scheduled, because there are so many interesting things in life! Therefore, it never happens to such girls that a man called and asked if he could come right now, and she answers: “Yes, of course, I’m not busy with anything anyway, I’m sitting here, watching a TV series...”
“Run away” also shows that you are not the girl who bursts into tears of gratitude and is ready to jump into bed and start cleaning, washing, cooking for the one who (finally, oh my God) gave her flowers, took her to a restaurant, took her for a ride in the car and told her a beautiful, crafty compliment.

At the same time, you cannot run into the horizon for long. The “attracted and fled” cycle must be repeated constantly .

So a man is always in good shape: it seems like here she is, on a date with me, she likes me and she likes me, she behaves so nicely, she feels good with me, but tomorrow she will be just as happy without me. And it’s not clear: does she need me or not? We need to do something else to check...

This is how the desire to win a girl is born.

Here signs of a man's attention and the fact that you are not indifferent to him - there are six of them. Have you checked at least 2-3 of them? Most likely, he is looking for a way to get to know you better. But if this does not happen, how to keep his interest and is it worth being unavailable for this purpose?

1. Talk about you

Is he interested in you? In this case, he will certainly want to find out as much as possible about you from your mutual friend or acquaintances.

2. Look

Did you catch his admiring glance? And this despite the fact that the young man is standing at the other end of the room? He glances over your figure briefly and then lingers on your eyes. It even seems to you that he is about to smile. This look says a lot! Signs of a man's attention begin with his gaze - 80% of the stronger sex are visual.

3. Conversation

Did he like you? If a guy finally gets up the courage to come closer to you to chat, it's undeniable good sign that he is interested in you. He will listen carefully to everything you say and respond to your every remark.

But in this moment he is most interested in the most important question: do you have anyone? Most often, young people ask this question to girls they want to date, and they certainly expect to receive a negative answer.

4. Decorations

Of course, this may seem a little strange, but if you want to meet a nice guy, then it is better not to wear rings, especially on your right hand, when going to a restaurant or to a party. When there is a decent distance between you and a young man, it is difficult for him to see which finger you have the ring on, so he may mistakenly think that you are married. And then all signs of a man’s attention will quickly disappear.

Don't let this happen! If it happened that the guy you liked still did not dare to ask you the most important question, do not despair, he will certainly ask your mutual friends about it.

5. Unexpected appearance

If you increasingly meet a young man in the most inexplicable places, rest assured: you have won his heart. This is possible if only he found out from friends about your plans for the day or secretly followed you. Signs of a man's attention can be the most unexpected.

When he meets you, he may become embarrassed and blush. His sudden “Hello! What destinies?" should be interpreted as “I don’t want to seem too intrusive, but I really like you.” If you also care about this man, don't be embarrassed. Stop and chat with him.

6. Everyone likes you

Did he like you? Have you noticed signs of a man's attention? If you are successful and happy woman, then why shouldn’t he pay attention to you? Of course he will! If suddenly for some reason your life does not suit you, it’s time to fix it.

Assess your opportunities for career growth and improvement appearance, spiritual development, reconsider your plans for the future and think about how you can achieve your goals. After all, every person is endowed with some kind of gift by nature, the main thing is to reveal it in time and begin to develop it. Undiscovered talent disappears over time without ever beginning to bear fruit. Act, develop, and then he will certainly pay attention to you.

Now you know 6 signs that someone likes you young man and he wants to ask you out on a date. Help him, be nice and friendly. Who knows, maybe this particular date will mark the beginning of a long and strong relationship. Or maybe we should try other techniques?

Is it worth being unavailable to keep your attention?

For many years now women's world It is generally accepted that an inaccessible woman is more successful with men. However, this is not true. Signs of a man's attention may depend entirely on other personal qualities.

In fact, this myth can cause more grief and unmet expectations in relationships than you can imagine. First of all, let's look at some classic examples of the behavior of an “unavailable” woman:

if he approaches you at a bar, you don't pay him any attention
the next day you don’t respond to his messages
prevaricate if he tries to invite you somewhere
tell him that you are busy with something when you are free

Do you recognize yourself?

Raising a Hypocrite

I can see why this behavior seems like a good idea - let him deserve me! What he got with such difficulty, he will value very highly. This psychology leads to the fact that a woman begins to manipulate a man, and he, in turn, begins to hide what he really feels and hides his true face from the woman.

So you play. You can tell him that you are busy even though you have plenty of free time. Or you can stop answering phone calls. Or cancel a meeting at the last minute without any apology. Simple psychology, right? The harder it is to get you, the more he wants what he can't have. But it is not a fact that the signs of a man’s attention will become more noticeable and he will spend more effort in order to win you.

What are the consequences?

Perhaps, at first everything is like that. But if you look one step further, you'll see that once he gets what he wants, you won't seem all that attractive. He is more passionate about the game, the process itself, than about you.

He is attracted to the idea of possessing you, but when he achieves this, he will wonder why he had to try so hard. Realizing this, some women come to the conclusion: “So I just need to continue the game to keep his interest.” And they continue the game, afraid of “losing their power.” This tactic will not lead to a long, happy relationship.

Who is the guy next to you?

In fact, the man who ends up staying with you if you play this game with him can only be of two types:

An insecure weakling who is always trying to figure out where he belongs.
A man who plays his own games with you.

The rest of the representatives of the stronger sex will do the following:

he will give up, turn around and leave, confused by your behavior and deciding that you are not interested in him;
will start to get bored and switch to someone more interesting;
will decide that you are too arrogant and not worth his time.

And that is why the game of “inaccessible” should be stopped. In any relationship, sincerity and trust are important. And the signs of a man’s attention should be considered from this point of view.

Signs of attention from a man in love

In order to find out if a man is in love with you, there are five signs that he is in love. Experts analyze each of them in this video.

Take it for yourself and tell your friends!

Men love the unavailable

So, you are too accessible for a guy if you have the following signs:

1. The most common word in your vocabulary is the word “Yes”

If you constantly say “yes” to him, agreeing with everything he says, plans and requests, this is the first sign that you are too available.

Don't have your own plans or opinions? Don't you just want to curl up on the couch and watch a movie or hang out with your girlfriends instead of taking him to a car show you're not interested in?

Let him go to similar men's events with friends, and meet your girlfriends and spend time the way you want, not your boyfriend.

2. You respond to his texts or calls instantly.

You answer any phone call or text message immediately.

And even if you are in the shower or toilet at that moment and hear the sound of your mobile phone, you instantly run out of the bathroom to answer a call or message.

Stop doing this!

After all, such behavior indicates that you are too accessible. It's okay to answer right away if you're not busy doing something. But if you're at the dentist's office or standing in the shower soapy, don't stop everything you're doing to answer the phone.

If he waits a little until you are free, nothing bad will happen.

3. You apologize for missed calls or messages.

You feel guilty because you were busy and he had to wait for you to call back. You apologize for missed texts/calls and for not being able to respond quickly.

When you see a missed call because you were in a meeting or even just sleeping, do you quickly call back and immediately proceed to apologize and explain?

Why are you doing it? After all, it looks desperate and pathetic.

Instead, try making a joke or continuing the conversation in a casual manner. This will make you much more mysterious and attractive. This behavior shows that you have other things to do and are not just focused on your partner's call.

And a woman who has other things to do besides a man is always attractive and desirable.

4. You initiate almost all conversations.

You initiate most of the conversations.

As a rule, you write or call him several times a day for no apparent reason.

Believe me, in this way, your actions reveal that you are not only an accessible woman, but also a slightly desperate one.

After all, if you are busy with your own life, as you should be, then there is no need to write or call your man 100 times a day. This kind of behavior is just repulsive.

5. You happily accept invitations to go on dates at the last minute.

You accept last-minute date requests from him.

For example, on Friday evening he calls you at 16:00 and invites you on a date, say, at 17:00. You have little time to get ready, but despite this, you quickly agree, at the same time showing poorly hidden joy that you were invited on a date.

You instantly abandon your plans for the evening and readily answer him: “Of course, I’ll be happy to be there in an hour!” You drop everything, including cooking, cleaning, girlfriends, and rush towards him.

Believe me, this behavior does not portray you in a favorable light. After all, this is certainly a sign that you are too accessible.

Perhaps sometimes it is worth refusing him something.

An inaccessible woman attracts

6. You let him change plans at the last minute.

You let him reschedule your date at the last minute.

For example, if you have already agreed to meet, and suddenly at the last moment you receive a message from him that the date is cancelled...

Of course, if there are good reasons for this, that’s one thing. But if the reason for the cancellation is simply his whim, it is unpleasant and indicates that he does not value you and finds other things more important than meeting you.

Look at yourself from the outside: you are already dressed up, made up and ready to go out, and then his call or message cancels all plans. Agree, there is little pleasant in such a situation.

Everyone must decide for themselves what to do in such a situation. But, of course, you need to show the man that such behavior is unpleasant for you, because you are a living person, and not a doll that he can play with whenever he wants.

7. You cancel plans with friends for him.

If you cancel previously planned plans with friends for his sake, this is already his small victory.

Of course, the reason for such a cancellation could be very serious.

But when you cancel plans just because your partner wants to have lunch with you or just chat, it's a sure sign that you're too available.

You shouldn’t indulge him in everything he wants. Sometimes you need to show character and express your desires.

There's nothing wrong with showing them. Believe me, this way your partner will only begin to appreciate your personality, and not see you as a girl who is ready to do anything for him.

8. You don't plan anything with your girlfriends.

Or, on the contrary, you do not plan anything with your girlfriends and friends, in the hope that you will spend time with him.

It looks at least funny and pathetic to wait for his invitation.

If your friends invite you somewhere, say, on a Saturday night, and you say no just because you are waiting for him, this means that you are dependent on him, which means you are very available.

On the contrary, you should not passively wait for his invitation, like manna from heaven! Live your life to the fullest, meet friends, don’t cancel your plans for him.

This way he will see that you do not live solely for him, that you have a lot to do, opportunities, and therefore you are very interesting to the opposite sex.

Don’t get hung up on his invitations and don’t wait for good weather by the sea! Act, live and have fun!

Signs of an approachable woman

9. You are always “free” for him.

Every time he asks if you are free, and you readily answer that yes, even if at that moment you are overwhelmed with work, or busy with a new hobby, or just at a meeting with friends.

You drop everything and rush to meet him.

It's even worse if you tell him you're not busy and he asks you to do something for him. This behavior suggests that he is simply taking advantage of you, and you are too accessible for him.

Unfortunately, there are many such men looking for their own benefit from communicating with a woman.

10. Your friends tell you that you are approachable.

If your friends are already saying that you are too accessible, perhaps this is a reason to think about it.

Listen to your loved ones, please!

Probably, you know better from the outside, and your behavior raises doubts among others.

Inaccessibility as a personality quality is a tendency not to accept someone’s advances (usually about women), not to allow close relationships, to avoid attempts from the outside to approach or get closer; to become unattainable due to any circumstances, conditions and difficult, incomprehensible to understand.

In the old days, women did not know how to refuse men anything. They were not given such a property. Whatever a man asks for, he won’t be denied anything. If you like a woman, just come up and she’s yours. I liked the other one - same story. No struggle, no passion, no worry. Even if you look like Quasimodo in appearance, or even like the devil himself, there will be no refusal, not a penny of resistance. The men got bored, they huddled together and went to the Creator! They have arrived, they are crowding, making noise, demanding admission. The Creator of the World came out to them and asked: “Well, guys, is something going wrong in life?” “No,” answers the most authoritative of the men, “in general, life suits us: the earth gives birth, Glory to You, and the forests are full of game, and cataclysms do not bother us, again, Glory to You!” But look, what parsley - we are bored in the sense of intersexual relations! Women do not refuse anyone or anything. Without struggle, we are not interested - sex is not a joy... you know? “Yes, I understand, no more stupid than you,” God answers. “I did what was best for you... You won’t regret it later?” I won't change it. I am, after all, the Creator, and not some shabby Genie! “No,” the men shout, “do as we ask, we won’t turn back, there’s something we don’t understand!”

“Well, have it your way,” the Lord waved his hand. And this is what happened: A kind of bastion of inaccessibility was formed around the Woman, such a halo, invisible to the eye, but irresistible. The Lord appreciated his work and, as usual, said that it was good! And here the men didn’t have a sexual life, but just steeplechase racing. A man wanted a woman and, according to old memory, directly, but that was not the case! The women have become picky: this one, you see, is crooked, and this one is red-haired; this one is short, and this one is lanky; this one is too fat, and this one is too thin; and bald people are considered the last thing. And from then on: courtship, serenades, gifts, knightly tournaments even... In general, it became necessary to achieve Women! Not all the men coped with this task, many retreated, and those who did not even dare to launch an attack... But there is nothing to do, nothing can be canceled, that’s the agreement. This is how we live now... but it’s interesting, not boring! And the trick is that Women themselves cannot understand anything. A bastion arose around them, but no one changed their inner essence - this woman resists the man, but inside herself she is rooting for him, worries and thinks: “Just don’t give up, dear! Please! If you climb over this accursed wall, it will be completely wrong!” But the men don’t know...

Inaccessibility is the mother of chastity. Many people equate chastity with virginity. It is not right. A chaste woman is the dream of every man. Chastity (Chastity) as a personality quality is the ability to be faithful to one’s husband, to establish close and intimate relationships with him, to treat him, his relatives and friends with respect and kindness, to inspire and help the husband in his work, to share with the husband the vows he has taken. In other words, chastity means being faithful or faithful to one and being completely inaccessible to all steel. This is the meaning of chastity.

A woman's strength lies in chastity. There are two extremes: debauchery, fornication - when you are easily accessible to everyone who is lazy, and an old maid who is absolutely inaccessible to anyone. Both extremes are vicious. Chastity is based on fidelity. In relation to women, it means to be faithful to your once made choice, your only one, and to be absolutely inaccessible to others.

Men love beautiful and inaccessible…. I’ll go put on my makeup... And lock myself in the safe!

A lonely girl is suing her cell phone operator for claiming she is unreachable.

The husband leaves to rest and asks his neighbor to look after his wife: “If he goes on a spree, give me a telegram: “My wife has died,” and I will understand.” A week later, such a telegram arrives, but the man was not in the room. Compassionate friends respond with a telegram: “Let me know when the funeral is.” A neighbor received this answer and wrote: “I don’t know when the funeral is, but access to the body continues.”

At home with her husband, a woman should be caring, gentle, affectionate, flexible, in a word, she should reveal her best qualities allowing her to be feminine, chaste and desirable. At work, she should be absolutely inaccessible to anyone. A woman should look beautiful, communicate respectfully, but at the same time, she should be absolutely inaccessible.

Oleg Torsunov, studying family relations, discovered the following pattern: at first glance, it seems that when a woman acts as in the family, behaves the same way with the men around her at work, as with her husband, then she attracts attention and enjoys their respect. But in fact, when a man flirts with a woman, he does not take her seriously. If speak about business relations, he will not take the woman seriously. Therefore, in business relationships, a woman should be inaccessible and courteous. She should not open her heart to anyone and should behave very calmly, delicately, from a distance. In this case, she will be respected by everyone, and things will go well for her. She will be promoted and will be seen as a reliable person. If she behaves any differently, she will not receive respect. Gossip will constantly revolve around her, and she will be the cause of problems in the team.

Inaccessibility is strong in tradition. Along with the fall of good traditions, women also fall. The weaker sex becomes easily accessible. Traditions usually center the culture of a society. When pious traditions disappear in a family, women become objects sexual harassment, fall, turn into gullible, frivolous people. The energy of passion, ignorance and degradation will constantly encroach on them. With the fall of women, the nobility of men falls. In a word, what we are seeing today is happening – decline and degradation.

Nothing to be proud of. Nevertheless, one woman comes to the priest and says: “I am the most fallen of all women.” Father: Calm down, my daughter. You are not the most fallen. You're just fallen.

An anecdote on topic. Wife to husband: “Are you staring at other people’s women again?” Husband: - Well, dear, I’m working up an appetite, but I’ll eat at home! Wife: - If you do this, “food” may become inaccessible... Husband: - You know, dear, now there are so many places where you can have a quick “snack”...

Peter Kovalev

“There must be some kind of mystery in a woman!” - poets write. “...And also a hint and a solution,” clarify men who have become victims of too mysterious women, lost in the labyrinths of inept or overexposed intrigues. We know for sure that men, due to their “hunting” nature, are greedy for women who need to be solved, achieved and conquered. No one is interested in easy prey! A man needs adrenaline and excitement in an attempt to tame an obstinate, rebellious and inaccessible woman. In this game he revels in his victory, and loves himself in it. This means that he will also love the woman who generates this storm of emotions in him. How to become mysterious, inaccessible and desirable for a man, without turning into a puzzle over which he will break his head?

Remain yourself. The first and main rule is to be natural. Modeling yourself in the image and likeness of a star, friend, mother means giving up your unique nature. Namely, this may be the secret that your ideal man, or for which he has already fallen in love. And even if these qualities seem bad or old-fashioned, do not rush to give them up. Do an audit. Perhaps among them there are those that make you charismatic and unlike other women. Men don't like boring patterns. It's better to be weird than like everyone else. Every woman should have her own “madness”!
Keep the secret. It was not for nothing that God gave us two ears and only one mouth. Listen more and talk less! Women often find it difficult to control the urge to chat. And if a man still asks questions, then it’s his own fault - let him listen. It won’t take long to hand over a “military secret,” let alone a personal one. When talking with a man (especially on first dates), avoid talking about yourself, and return too frank questions, leave them unanswered, or turn them into jokes. For example: “Mmm... What a good question! But for now it’s a secret! Can you keep secrets? Yes? That’s good... Me too!” Become a man's interviewer yourself. Let him tell you what he considers a mystery in a woman.
Intrigue. You can always keep male interest warmed up with the help of intrigue and understatement. Men have a very developed imagination, although they themselves do not always suspect it. So, for example, to the question “Are you free tonight?” Do not answer in detail and directly. Give a man some food for thought. Say cryptically: “I can’t answer. I signed a non-disclosure agreement about this secret!” And in general, do not rush to answer questions. Take a break. She's intriguing! Although, as the wise Julia Lambert, the main character of Somerset Maugham’s famous novel, said: “Don’t pause unnecessarily, and if you take it, take it as long as you can!” A subtly maintained pause intrigues better than a half-naked body.
Be unpredictable. No matter how indignant men are, not understanding the train of women’s thoughts and the logic of their actions, their curiosity is always aroused by women who are difficult to predict. Be unpredictable! For example:
- Abruptly interrupt a monotonously flowing conversation that does not foretell any surprises and say something like: “Look at these lovers. They are so cute!". And as if nothing had happened, continue your languid conversation.
- End a rapidly developing date yourself, abruptly and much earlier than expected. Do not be fooled by questions and do not agree to persuasion. Leave without further explanation, but leave an honest hope for the next meeting.
- Disappear unexpectedly in the middle of a date, leaving a note on a napkin with text like: “Gone to save the planet from global warming!” and draw a smiley face.
Be absolutely beautiful. One of the main mysteries in a woman should always remain the procedures with which she brings her beauty: depilation, manicure, pedicure, eyebrow correction, masks, curlers, etc. Let him continue to be in holy ignorance that the evening “ “butterfly,” was still a “caterpillar” in the morning. And let him continue to think that you were born with makeup, hair, shaved legs and lace underwear when he calls and happily says: “Get ready! I’ll be there in ten minutes!”
Be an actress. All women are actresses, but true skill lies in remaining yourself, always being different, mysterious and incomprehensible. A man will immediately feel a mediocre game, insincerity and manipulation. Imagine that your life is a movie, and you are the main character in it. Play for an Oscar! And play, admiring yourself, your thoughts, feelings and actions. Think about how to behave in a given situation so that, looking at it from the outside, you can admire yourself. Get into the role of a chic woman in a chic film. Believe it yourself, and your man will look at you with your own loving eyes.
Learn from your idols. It is difficult to develop the habit of always remaining mysterious to a man if this is not in the blood, and in the family all the women were not best example in order to try clever tactics or copy a ready-made behavior model. Books, films, and television will be a storehouse of ideas and tips. Strong women who have had armies of men at their feet share their secrets in autobiographical revelations, books and films. In their success stories there is always something to learn and answers to questions about the incomprehensible and mysterious female soul. The main thing is to remember rule No. 1 - improve, but remain yourself.
Don't philosophize. Don’t overdo it with secrets, riddles and inaccessibility, so that it doesn’t turn out like in the joke:
- There must be a mystery in a woman...
- Are you saying that there are no mysteries in me?!
- One riddle, not a collection of problems in quantum physics!